March 5th, 2026
Mar. 5th, 2026 03:37 amAnyway, this is a very long update, so I will put it behind a cut.
1- State of the Phnee
( Update under the cut! )January 21st, 2026
Jan. 21st, 2026 09:33 pmKK has bought herself a walker with wheels (purple, naturally) and is looking into acquiring a motorized scooter as well, for getting around outside the house. We’re not sure if our insurance will pay for both or only one, so she’s holding off making a claim until she gets the scooter and will go from there. Hopefully that will improve her pain levels while outside the house, because that’s been an increasing problem for her for the past few months. She got x-rays taken a few weeks ago, and the arthritis has progressed to her hips and her back, which is not good news. I’m hoping she and her doctor can discuss better pain management than what she’s been getting so far (which basically boils down to a lot of NSAIDs and Tylenol Arthritis). I don’t know at all what the future holds there.
January 18th, 2026
Jan. 18th, 2026 01:13 amJanuary 15th, 2026
Jan. 15th, 2026 04:57 amJanuary 1th. 2026
Jan. 13th, 2026 11:51 pmJanuary 11th, 2026
Jan. 11th, 2026 09:48 pmJanuary 9th, 2026
Jan. 9th, 2026 09:38 pm1. State of the Phnee
a. I am slowly getting my ducks in a row for improving my fitness. I obtained some resistance bands with a bit more oomph than the ones I got myself for physiotherapy a couple of years ago, as well as some interlocking/puzzle-type mats for my bedroom floor because I am a wussy who doesn’t like sitting or kneeling on the floor (it bruises our boneses, precious!). My friend fearsclave gave me a two-week trial of an app called FitBod (a bit on the nose, but whatever) which provides me with exercises based on not only my fitness levels but also what equipment I have available, which is quite handy. It has a couple of bugs I need to work out (pun only sort of intended), such as giving me dumbbell exercises when I don’t own dumbbells, but it still seems well worth a try.
I also went for a one-hour walk in the late afternoon yesterday and got rewarded with a winter rainbow in the distance. I had never considered that winter could also produce rainbows, but it makes sense: snow is just crystallized water, right? And this rainbow was more of a large smudge than the classic arc shape, so that makes sense to my amateur brain. Anyway, it definitely made the walk in the ice and cold worth it.
b. My friend Jan put me onto a local market (the Martintown Market) which stocks up once a week on low-cost produce and also has locally raised pork and chicken. I went yesterday for the first time to check them out and was pleasantly surprised. It was smaller than I’d imagined, just a very small room with a dozen or so produce bins and two upright freezers right off County Road 18. I almost missed it because the only sign on the road is an itty bitty one that says, “Come in, we’re open!” without specifying what it is. Still, I was able to fill half of a regular reusable grocery bag with fruits and veggies for $15, which likely would have cost me twice as much if I’d gone to the grocery store. I tried to be mindful of how much I got, because a lot of people depend on that little store for their produce, and since KK and I are just two people and she doesn’t eat a lot of produce, I wanted to make sure there was plenty left for other people. I’m pretty pleased overall. I will see how long this produce lasts, and I will probably make this a regular part of my route.
c. I’m taking over as Clerk of Ministry & Counsel this year, which means putting together the agenda for every meeting, but more importantly I am responsible for writing all our reports and for putting together Committees of Care, Clearness Committees, and general care for the Members of Ottawa Monthly Meeting. I am a little terrified that I won’t be able to fill the shoes of our last Clerk, who declared they were stepping down last fall. Even if they wanted to come back, they are now facing a terminal cancer diagnosis, so they will have to focus on their health and family for the next few months. M&C are a great group, so I know I will get lots of support, but I’m still pretty intimidated.
2. State of the smallholding
a. I lost one of the quail on Friday. I’m pretty bummed because I couldn’t figure out why she’d died. She was dry, so it’s not like she got wet and then couldn’t get warm. I don’t think it was lack of food or water, and she showed no signs of illness or injury. I wonder if she didn’t get eggbound but didn’t suffer a prolapse like last time, but I’m not about to perform an amateur necropsy, so I’m just going to have to keep doing my best and see.
b. I got myself a new-to-me John Deere snowblower a few weeks ago, but I can’t figure out how to keep it running. It turns on just fine, but the moment I switch off the throttle (I might be getting the terminology wrong), it sputters to a halt. I will have to go to YouTube to see what I’m doing wrong and hope I can figure it all out.
3. State of the news
a. WELP. The United States attacked/invaded Venezuela during the night of the 3rd, and kidnapped President Maduro and his wife and have declared that the US will be serving as an “interim government” until further notice, with no end date given. Also, apparently American oil companies will be taking over Venezuelan oil to “revitalize and rebuild” or some shit.
American interference in South American politics, and deposing dictators in general, has a terrible track record. This is blatantly not about the dictatorship, anyway, just about gaining control of Venezuelan oil. They’re just using it as a thinly veiled excuse to install a regime more favourable to the US, which will result in the population getting oppressed and exploited for several more years before they rise up and overthrow that government and then it gets replaced with something that may or may not be just as terrible. Fuck American imperialism, frankly.
I was hoping for a less mealy-mouthed response to this by other world leaders, especially Canada. People seem so impressed by Carney, but I am not seeing it. I wish Canada would grow a fucking backbone and take a firm policy stand on these matters, but I guess that’s too much to hope for. It will also be interesting to see how China reacts to this, since I believe Venezuela sells the majority of its oil to them. It’s likely to get messy…
I made it!
Oct. 18th, 2025 10:29 pmIt went super well. Better than I even hoped for, honestly. The surgery itself took an hour and a half, and I was in the recovery room for just under 4 hours. Normally they only keep you in recovery for an hour or two, but because I have Severe Obstructive Sleep Apnea it was protocol to keep me there longer until they were sure I was taking in enough oxygen on my own before transferring me to a surgical bed.
I expected a lot of pain based on my reading and from KK's experience, but there was next to none. On the 1 to 10 scale I spent most of the time at a 1, sometimes inching up to 2. I once overdid it drinking water (two sips was fine, three was too many!) and the pain went up to not-quite-3 for maybe 10 minutes. At first I assumed it was that I was still under the effects of the anesthesia and then under the effects of the Dilaudid pill they gave me, but after well over 15 hours it became obvious that, no, I just wasn't in all that much pain or discomfort. So, yay, I guess!
My entire nursing team consisted of people whose names began with S: Sarah, Sophie (who was a 3rd year nursing student), Samara, and Saima. Only when the day nurse came in the morning I was to be discharged did the pattern break, because his name was Dat. They were all super sweet and kind and very patient with me, since I kept asking a million questions about what they were doing, and what was that piece of equipment for, and ooh, what were they checking for with THAT gizmo? etc. Sophie in particular was super nervous because she was obviously brand new and learning, so I assured her that we would learn together, and we had loads of fun examining the equipment, asking questions, and whenever I learned something while she was away I would tell her when she got back and she'd whip out a tiny notebook and write it all down. It was super sweet, and we had a good giggle about it before her shift was over.
The least fun part of the whole thing was trying to figure out all the unspoken hospital rules (should I use the washroom when the toilet has one of those cups meant to measure urine output, or was that meant for a specific patient? Except I have to pee and there's no other washroom! I'm supposed to take walks, but where can I walk where I won't be in the way? Etc.), and I was quite glad to leave on Thursday.
KK drove me to and from the hospital, and was somehow more wiped out than I was after all of it. She apparently overdid it by walking with me to the day surgery room and then sitting in the admittedly very uncomfortable chairs until such time as I was transferred to my bed for the night. She has spent most of the past few days napping as a result.
I wasn't up to much for the rest of Thursday, but we did stop at the pharmacy to get my prescriptions: I have about 10 doses of Dilaudid to take as needed for pain, and an antacid that I need to take every day for the next six months. KK has impressed upon me that it is VERY IMPORTANT to take said antacid unless I want to invite a world of trouble upon myself, so I've been very diligent about it. I took one dose of Dilaudid on Thursday but didn't need one last night, which was nice. I haven't even really needed Tylenol, for the most part. I am working my way up to taking all three of my vitamin supplements, because they are freaking horse pills and rather difficult to digest, but I should be able to work them into my routine (I need to take them three times a day, God help me) with some practice and a lot of alarms set up on my phone.
Yesterday the dogs were assholes and knocked over their glass jar of treats, which shattered all over the tile floor of the kitchen. KK very kindly drove me to town after her work day was over, and we stopped by the pharmacy so I could pick up some milk of magnesia (a nurse from the hospital called and recommended I pick some up "just in case"), and then I popped into Canadian Tire for some bags for our kitchen compost bin since we were almost out. KK went to PetValu to pick up new dog treats (they're the dogs' reward for going into their crates at night like good girls) and I went to the Dollarama next door to pick up a new (plastic) jar for the treats along with a couple of new pairs of reading glasses since the dogs ate one of mine and another broke very randomly the night before my surgery. It was the weirdest thing: I picked them up as normal and the arm just *fell off* like it was an injured starfish. No idea what happened there. *shrug*
Unsurprisingly, the house was in the same or even slightly worse shape than when I left on Wednesday morning. Thursday I contented myself with unloading and then re-loading the dishwasher, and yesterday I didn't do all that much except clean up the broken jar the dogs so generously provided. I did a few more dishes and put away the vacuum sealer I'd forgotten to put away before surgery (oops), and that was about it, as I was still feeling pretty tired after the surgery.
Today I was a lot more productive, but I'm still moving in slow motion. I took a shower, which felt amazing after not being "allowed" to shower for a couple of days to give my incision sites the chance to heal.
I got more dishes done, broke down a bunch of boxes for the recycling on Monday (it's a fibre pick-up day!), collected the garbage, and managed to clear a portion of the front deck so it looks a little less like hillbilly hoarders live here. I also cleaned my bathroom, which I should have done before my surgery but I kind of ran out of time (oops). At least it's clean and sparkly now! I checked on the quail and changed out their food and water and gave them all a generous helping of mealworms as a treat and as a small apology for not doing it yesterday (I did check on them and their food and water levels were fine, have no fear, I just feel guilty about them anyway). I also washed the incubator and put it away along with the heat plates for next year when I'd like to start incubating more chicks again. I won't be incubating any during the winter, it just seems like a bad idea to do it when it's super cold outside.
KK also left me a surprise in the form of a clogged kitchen sink which she'd clearly tried to fix using a plastic plumbing snake, which then got suck in the drain, and she just... left it there for me to find without telling me about it. I couldn't dislodge it (she'd rammed it in all the way, and theoretically I am not supposed to lift, push or pull more than 10lbs for the next month), and when I asked her about it she said she was hoping the sink would drain before she tried again. I had drained the sink in my attempts to dislodge the thing, so she tried again--and broke it off inside the drain. So now I have to call a plumber on Monday to get it taken out by a professional. I am not super impressed. *heavy sigh* If I didn't know better, I'd swear she was a man, given the amount of weaponized incompetence she seems able to wield at a moment's notice. The only difference is that, in this case, I didn't ask her to unclog the sink, so I guess she did try? I don't know.
I've sent out the announcements for Quaker Meeting tomorrow, and I did take a dose of Dilaudid tonight because I may have overdone it a tad today, and I was quite sore to say the least. My main goal is to not be in pain so I can get some sleep, and hopefully tomorrow I will be recovered. I still want to try to finish cleaning up the kitchen. KK said she'd help me with that today but ended up taking a four and a half hour nap instead, and there's only so much I can do at one time while I'm still recovering from surgery. Yes, in theory I should be resting/taking it easy, but if I don't get this shit done no one will, and the house will continue to deteriorate, so I'm tackling things in smallish increments and hoping for the best. Tomorrow I am planning on moving the last batch of quail that I incubated to the hutches in the garage, which will allow me to clean up and break down the brooder and put that away for the season as well. I will probably have to buy a second brooder for next year, because I discovered that while it can comfortably hold six quail, eight almost-grown quail are very cramped inside it and so they are all having very gentle squabbles with each other about food and water and mealworms. But yes, not having the brooder on my kitchen counter will save me so much space! I can't wait.
I must say, I can totally understand why people get addicted to Dilaudid. Pain? Never heard of her! I think that I'm still pretty safe since I've only had four 1mg doses in the past four days (I got a dose right before leaving the hospital on Thursday when they heard I had a one-hour car ride ahead of me).
Anyway, that's what's happened with me in the last few days. I hope you're all doing well, and I will catch you on the flip side, friends!
However, the sacrifice was not for nothing. I now have eavestroughs all around my house, which I didn't before. We've been in serious danger of water infiltrating the house all summer whenever it rained, so getting gutters installed was one of my priorities this year. We had some bad luck with the weather that meant we had to postpone the installation a few times, but the contractor was finally able to get it done yesterday and he did a fantastic job. I am very excited to no longer have to worry every time it rains. I still have to get some downspout extenders, but that's a minor detail and not strictly necessary. It's just that the grading around the house needs to be redone, so right now any water flows toward the house instead of away from it, which is why having downspout extenders would be helpful.
I also had an electrician in. Well, two of them came, but I think one of them was an apprentice or assistant. Anyway, they came to replace one of the outdoor electrical outlets which didn't have a GFI, making it a little more unsafe to use (although not completely unsafe) as well as to replace my bathroom fan which wasn't working and which my home inspector had told me I'd need to get fixed. Turns out the fan was totally fine, it was just unplugged. *rolls eyes* I wonder if the previous owners unplugged it because it is ungodly loud, but either way it's now plugged back in and working great.
We also worked out why my workshop/shed wasn't getting any electricity. Apparently the electricity was being supplied by a daisy chain of extension cords, which is, uh, not exactly up to code, and it seems the previous owners just took one of the extension cords with them when they left. Oops? Anyway, I got quoted about $4,000 to get the shed wired up properly because it would require a backhoe to go through my "driveway" (which is not a driveway, but it is hard-packed ground, so I guess it sort of counts as a driveway?) and dig a trench in which to bury the wire needed for the electrical supply. So the plan for now is to buy a new extension cord and use that until next year at least. It's not ideal, but as price tags go it's a bit steep for our first year in the house when we still have so many necessary projects (the grading around the house, some extra plumbing in the basement, reinforcing both decks to fix some stability issues, and of course all the gardening stuff and building up infrastructure for more livestock). I will do a bit of investigating to see if there are extra safety measures I can implement to reduce the risk of short circuits or electrical fires in the meantime. The previous owners obviously made it work, so I'm trying not to worry about it too much. I do need to source some firewood as the workshop has a wood stove and I would like to practice my woodworking skills over the winter without freezing my butt or my fingers off.
Ideally I'd like to get my skills to the point of being able to build a lot of the animal-related infrastructure that I want to install on the property. Right now I have bought two hutches for the quail, but they have some design flaws that make it difficult to put food and water in and also make changing the bedding a little harder than it has to be, even though the bottom has a pull-out drawer. Right now I'm still in the process of building up my basic tool collection. I just picked up a jigsaw and a miter saw on sale (very exciting!), and Karen already bought a circular saw last year. I have a few hand tools already as well as a drill, so I'm hoping to be able to have a full set of basic tools (as well as a small sawdust management system) by the end of the winter.
This morning was the monthly meeting of Ministry and Counsel, and the Clerk has asked that someone else take up the mantle for next year, so it looks like that person is going to be me. One member is leaving at the end of this year (it's the end of her term), another is bogged down with other commitments and doesn't have the bandwidth for it), one only just joined and wants to get more experience before taking on Clerking duties, and the other person wasn't at the meeting today (and I personally think he lacks the organizational skills for it anyway, as uncharitable as that sounds). I am a little nervous, as being the Clerk of M&C feels like a Really Big Deal(TM), but the current Clerk has promised to mentor me, as they are not leaving at the end of the year, so that's something at least.
In unrelated but potentially excellent news, I spoke to my father today since the results from his heart monitor came back, and there is a good chance he may not even need an ablation for his atrial flutter. He's being referred to a specialist for a consultation in a couple of weeks, and we will find out more at that time. Fingers crossed that it all turns out well!
On that note, it's time to get back to work. It got wildly busy last night, so I'm hedging my bets tonight. Catch you on the flip side, friends!
An uneventful day
Jun. 8th, 2025 10:12 pmOtherwise I packed more boxes in the basement, which took more time than I anticipated. What's left in the basement is all stuff that's weirdly shaped or a bit too big to fit in most boxes, and a lot of it is really random shit that belongs to KK that I can't even identify, which makes labelling the boxes a bit of a challenge. Still, I made some headway, which is something.
KK is spending tonight at her friend H's hotel again, and so I have to medicate Rika the Chihuahua and feed Libby (the long-haired tabby) her special kidney food on top of the regular bedtime routine stuff. I'll be doing that in a few minutes, as soon as I've put the quail to bed.
I have also, because I am a special kind of crazy, applied to adopt a senior Brittany from a rescue group. His name is Odin, and he's 10 years old, and he looks like an absolute sweetheart, albeit with the same escape artist and counter surfing tendencies as my current set of hooligans. So, you know, he'll fit right in! Of course, there's no guarantee my application will be accepted. Rescues are notoriously finicky about placing animals, so they may find something wrong with either the new house, the new property, or my general attitude and philosophy with regards to owning dogs and the care and treatment thereof. I don't have a fence yet, although we do definitely plan on building a six-foot fence to keep the current set of hooligans from haring off and terrorizing our neighbour's dairy cows. I don't want to constantly be worried that my dogs are being a nuisance to the neighbours. Anyway, we shall see.
Now, I am off to medicate the dog, feed the cat, take a quick shower, and then lapse into a hopefully at least slightly restorative slumber. I don't recall if I mentioned it, but last week I fell asleep one night before putting on my CPAP mask, and I felt like absolute garbage the next day. So while I hadn't noticed the night-and-day difference in energy levels that other people have said come with using a CPAP, I can report with full confidence that it is, in fact, doing something.
It feels later in the week than it is...
May. 14th, 2025 06:01 amI managed to get about six hours of sleep and probably would have slept longer had I not had to get up early for my therapy appointment. I have made the grievous error of agreeing to multiple meetings and appointments this week. I keep trying to not schedule stuff during my evening and night shifts, and I keep failing abysmally. It's just never a good idea, but sometimes there just isn't another choice. Alas.
So later today I have a meeting with tow members of Ministry & Counsel about a small worship group one of them wants to start centered around chronic illness, and on Friday I am going to my new credit union to sign my life away in order to qualify for a reduced interest rate on my new mortgage. Okay, I exaggerate slightly for effect, but essentially I have to switch over to a checking account with the credit union and have my pay direct deposited there in order to qualify.
I've sent out feelers to my coworkers to see if anyone will trade my weekend day shifts in 10 days with me. Getting the weekend off to be able to focus on packing would be a godsend, but I'm not going to hold my breath. People are pretty accommodating at my workplace, but we're getting into summer vacation time and people are a busier with kids and commitments and stuff. Fingers crossed, anyway.
Okay. Time to wrap this up. Catch you on the flip side, friends!
Covid continues to suck
May. 6th, 2025 07:28 pmThe oil splash over my right hand yesterday has turned into two very impressive looking blisters on my ring finger and knuckle. They're still a little painful, but nothing terrible. It mostly looks like I've developed a highly localized case of bubonic plague, although maybe not quite so dire. I wish there was a lesson to be learned from this about kitchen safety, but it was honestly a freak thing, and I was merely the victim of the laws of physics.
I got an amusing call from someone from Ministry & Counsel on my way to work, asking me to help him troubleshoot issues with his new laser printer of all things. Now, faithful readers will likely recall that I am not exactly a computer wizard, and indeed my coworkers have joked for years that I have a "computer curse," wherein computers will randomly malfunction around me in ways that don't make sense. Anyway, I explained that I was driving to work and generally not a computer person, and then I suggested Googling the problem because that's my go-to when first trying to troubleshoot computer issues. Now, this guy used to be a really savvy computer person, but he hasn't kept up with all the latest advances, so it wasn't like I was talking to a babe in arms. He thanked me and told me he'd try it before hitting up one of his techy friends. I am still baffled but also slightly honoured at the thought that I project enough competence that people now randomly call me to help with completely unrelated stuff! XD
In house news, I'm going to need to find some extra energy somewhere in order to start packing up the house properly. I've hired someone to come help pack in two weeks' time, the week before the move, but it's only for three days, and that won't be enough to get it all done. It should be a huge help, at least, to have one other able-bodied person there. In the meantime, I need to pack up as much of the rest of the house as I can.
I feel like the most boring person ever, because I have very little of substance to post about lately. Hopefully I will have something more interesting soon. Thanks for bearing with me, friends, and I will catch you on the flip side!
Ups and downs
Apr. 20th, 2025 08:16 pmI was the Greeter for Quaker Meeting today, and it went well. We've had some ruffled feathers in the Meeting of late, because everyone is very much on edge from, well, everything. *gestures broadly* The constitutional crisis in the US, innocent people getting deported to what is essentially a concentration camp in El Salvador (technically it's a prison, but the pictures from there are horrific, with men packed in like sardines, sometimes 80 to a cell, having to sleep standing up, etc.). This is not to say that I believe guilty people should be sent there either. No one, regardless of their status, should be sent to a place like that. Not even the worst, most horrific offenders, because that place is a horror show and even the worst criminals who have committed the most heinous crimes must be treated with a minimum of dignity, because they are human beings.
There's also the Canadian federal election coming up on April 28th. KK and I went to the advance polls today and cast our ballots. There were very few people there today, but CTV news reported that 2 million Canadians went to vote in advance on Friday, which is apparently a record! This is very encouraging indeed. I went over to the Elections Canada website, and of our population of 38,131,104 people, we have 27,642,171 people eligible to vote (i.e. citizens who are 18 years old or older and not the Chief Electoral Officer of Canada). From what I can see we've had a voter turnout that hovers in the 60% range, give or take, for the past 30 years, so I'd love to see more voter engagement this time around. I think I've missed one election in my adult life, although I don't remember which one it was. I have forbears who died for my right to vote, so I'm not about to squander it.
I just had a quick Skype call with my parents, and my mother immediately ratted out my father who apparently passed out today. He tried to blow it off, but I was not having it. I have extricated a promise from him to go see a doctor about it tomorrow. My father had a stroke nearly three years ago, and even though he was very lucky and came out of it with no ill effects, that still puts him at risk for another one. He said he wasn't feeling sick or dizzy, he just lost consciousness for a few seconds. *beats head against the nearest wall* Both my parents are terrible patients, and they tend to be noncompliant with a lot of the treatments they are prescribed as well. To say I am worried about this would be a fucking understatement. I reminded my mother that she had agreed with me that it would be a good idea to get a Life Alert button (or an equivalent, but honestly my research showed that Life Alert is one of the more comprehensive service providers out there), and she once again agreed with me. I don't think I can count on her to get one because I don't think she has the wherewithal to go through the whole process, and my father is pretty resistant to the idea at all. I don't know if I can convince both of them to go through with it, but I am damned well going to try.
Having aging parents is a LOT, y'all.
Okay. I am going to go do a last check on the quail, and then go to bed. I changed out their bedding today (it was *gross*), and they are super happy. They dug and scratched and floofed their feathers and made little nests in the pine shavings and made happy quail noises. It was absolutely adorable. They also laid two more eggs, which is awesome. I think tomorrow I will finally be making a recipe using the quail eggs, now that I have a full dozen (meaning the equivalent of about four chicken eggs).
Catch you on the flip side, friends!
I Am Sabbath-ing Wrong
Mar. 23rd, 2025 08:59 pmC is at the exact age when a lot of little girls become "directors," or what is often very uncharitably referred to as being "bossy." I had to very gently redirect her a couple of times when her orders turned rude (mostly just to remind her that saying "please" is important when asking someone to do something for you and not just order them about). While G happily played with a toy cash register and a Fisher Price garage thingie with an elevator, C started with the play kitchen and served me a toy ice cream cup with six scoops of ice cream. I pointed out that it was a lot of ice cream and that I wasn't sure I'd be able to eat all of it, but C wasn't having it. "You can eat it. Just look at your stomach--it's really big!" I mean, true, but also, ouch. Out of the mouths of babes. I'm pretty sure there was no malice behind it, although it's likely she's already unconsciously absorbing some of the fatphobic messaging we have in our society. Anyway, I agreed with her that my stomach *was* big, and then she "helped" me eat the ice cream.
Once the ice cream had been consumed to her satisfaction, she grabbed some paper and colouring pencils, and proceeded to instruct me on how to colour a pattern she'd learned in school. It wasn't my favourite activity, but I've spent time doing way worse things. C and G's grandmother spent a good chunk of time with us too, and helped to wrangle Gabor when he got a little too rambunctious and tried to go get his mother, who was in Meeting for Worship at the time. He fussed a little, but a promise of crackers and cheese got both kids settled pretty well, and eventually the Resident Friend came through with some pre-made Ritz crackers and cheese filling.
After that we had yet another called meeting for the State of Society Report, and it took fully an hour and a half to read through the latest draft and dicker about punctuation and specific word choices and all manner of details. I understand that it's necessary work, but at this point I've been ready to chuck the State of Society Report out the nearest window.
Once the called meeting was over I had barely enough time to run home and turn on my computer to join the first meeting for Nominating Committee. I've agreed to be the co-clerk with one other member of the committee, and we spent the rest of the meeting talking about potential nominees to represent Ottawa Monthly Meeting at Canadian Yearly Meeting. Overall, it was quite productive.
I'd barely finished with Nominating Committee when it was time for a Zoom call with my parents. Luckily my father understands Zoom enough to help my mother log into the calls, and so the only real problem we have now is that my free account only allows us to chat for 40 minutes at a time. We had a really nice conversation, and then it was time to throw dinner together, eat, wrangle the dogs, and watch an episode of The Equalizer.
And then before I knew it, it was time for bed, and here I am. The entire day went by in a blur, and I am exhaustipooped, to quote KK. Time to pass out for the night. Catch you on the flip side, friends!
Spoon deficit
Mar. 22nd, 2025 09:35 pmTurns out, shopping at Costco at midday on a Saturday with KK is really stressful. Mostly it was the circumstances: the place was packed to the gills with people. Normally I grab a cart and sort of use that as a shield against other people, but since KK was there she grabbed a motorized cart to drive, and that left me kind of adrift, with people coming at me with carts from all angles, including KK, who did not have great control over the motorized cart. I tried walking behind her but she kept stopping the cart because she thought I was "slowing down," which would then make me run into her. She told me to walk in front of her, and when I did she kept nearly running into me with the cart. I'm used to going at my own pace, and trying to navigate personal hazards and keep track of KK and stuff was actually pretty draining.
I used the cheque at the cash register, so apparently they don't check particularly hard to make sure you're the primary cardholder, and KK's electric cart started acting up and refusing to go. She kept having to switch it off, wait a few seconds, then switch it on again before it would respond to her commands. We managed to make it through checkout and went to the membership counter. By then my brain was buzzing a little, and things were so loud that I couldn't hear most of what KK was discussing with the lady at the counter. Eventually I approached when KK indicated she wanted my opinion, although I only caught bits and pieces of it. We eventually settled on switching things up so that I'm the primary account holder since I'm the one who does most of the shopping, and then things got hilarious.
The service rep looked at KK very seriously and said: "So you understand, everything will now be in your daughter's name and go to her?"
I giggled and told her I was very flattered that she thought I was that young and good-looking. KK got her up to speed on the fact that I'm six years her junior, and the poor lady was a little embarrassed, but we all laughed it off. I can understand the misapprehension: I was standing back and not really participating in the conversation (because I couldn't hear, but from the outside it looks like a very teenager-y thing to do), and my hair is currently dyed bright blue, and since I was wearing an N95 mask it made it harder to see my actual age. Anyway, we had fun with it.
Then KK's cart died again and we were stuck for a couple of minutes while she got it going again. We flagged it to one of the employees, who told KK that it was because she was leaning too far forward in her seat, but it died again once we got it to the car. After that there was no shifting it, so I ended up physically dragging it across the whole [expletive deleted] parking lot. Let me tell you, dragging an inert motorized shopping cart is not even remotely fun.
We got home and I put the groceries away. Actually, yesterday, at KK's suggestion I completely re-organized the fridge in a way that is supposed to be more ADHD-friendly, with the produce in the fridge door. At the very least, this will keep the produce from freezing in the fridge. I don't know why the fridge keeps freezing my food, but I've been losing more than I would like to that. Hopefully this will work out in the longer term. The fridge door isn't super convenient for keeping vegetables, unfortunately, it's just not the right shape.
I was signed up for an online workshop this afternoon on community building, and that was super interesting and I don't for a second regret it, but I didn't get my seeds started, and tomorrow is going to be taken up with Quaker things for basically the whole day. I might be able to get it done Monday, but I was really hoping to get it done earlier than that. Maybe I'll stay up later tomorrow night, since I'm starting night shifts on Monday anyway, and try to get some of the seeds started then instead. I did at least figure out some of the grow light setup, and I will try to sort out the rest tomorrow. Either way, I am entirely out of spoons, and probably in a serious spoon deficit at this point.
Okay, on that note, it's time for bed. I have to be at Meeting early tomorrow to be ready for First Day School. I don't know if there will be any children there, but I need to be ready in case there are.
My brain is blank
Mar. 20th, 2025 09:09 pmMinistry & Counsel are driving me a little nuts this week. There has been a flurry of emails about the State of Society Report, which honestly should be finished by now but people from the Meeting keep goddamn nitpicking at it and I am ready to scream. There's also a lot of dithering about whether to extend the contract of the Resident Friend, who has come to the end of his three year contract. Everyone seems to be in favour of extending it, but typically contracts don't extend beyond three years, and the previous Resident Friend actually hired a lawyer to force the Meeting to extend her contract for a number of reasons I won't get into here so as to protect her privacy. It was super messy, and everyone is understandably a bit skittish about having a repeat performance, even though there is absolutely no indication that the current Resident Friend would do the same. It's not even up to Ministry & Counsel whether to extend the contract, we just make a recommendation one way or the other. Bah.
I have decided this year to pay someone to deal with the ocean of poop in my backyard after the winter season. I want to put in a couple of raised beds, but this will work better if the yard isn't covered in dog poop. Two Brittanies produce more poop than you'd imagine over a single winter season. Anyway, hopefully this will be the start of making the backyard look less like a muddy cesspool for the dogs to wallow in. I actually paid someone for the past two years to do a spring clean-up, and that company stopped offering the service in my area (it may be temporary but they can't give me a timeline of when they think they'll have someone in my area again), so I found another service with comparable prices. I'm actually pretty impressed that there are two companies that offer poop removal services in my city. Who knew?
I've ordered groceries for tomorrow, and I must say that ordering groceries has been a blessing. I was always reluctant to take advantage of delivery because it felt like cheating, somehow, but honestly not having to spend two hours a week on grocery shopping has changed my life. Two hours doesn't seem like all that much, but my God it drained all my energy like no one's business, and it would just wreck half a day (prepare the list, drive to the store, shop, drive home, unpack the groceries, collapse from lack of spoons). So, yeah, now I either do pick-ups during weeks when I'm working regular day shifts, or delivery when I'm working evenings, nights, and weekends. I'm trying to view it as an accommodation and not feel too guilty about it. I also make a point of tipping as well as I can (the website has a limit on how much you can tip the delivery person, alas).
Tomorrow I have therapy in the morning, and then my last evening shift starting at 3pm. KK had an appointment with the registered dietician from the bariatric clinic today, and it looks like I'm going to have to work a little harder to get more protein and nutrition into our everyday food. I've been looking at one of the bariatric cookbooks I got when she first told me she was going to get the surgery, and much as I feared, a lot of that food is quite simply stuff she won't eat. So much of it is tomato-based, or involves tofu or mushrooms or beans or coconut. Most of the recipes sound delicious to me, but I will have to make some serious modifications or maybe just take inspiration from them rather than following them exactly. I've had some success in the past from substituting some ingredients in recipes, so hopefully we'll be able to find something that works.
I'm planning to incorporate increasingly bariatric-friendly recipes in our meals, so that KK will have a chance to get used to them and it won't be a huge change all at once, once she's past the point of the liquid food/puréed food part of the post-surgical diet. It will be good for me to get used to it as well, but I'm much more of an omnivore than she is. When I was talking to the dietitian on Tuesday I kind of had to rack my brain when she asked me if there were foods I didn't like at all. There are definitely some: I don't really care for olives, sardines, and liver, among other things. I don't think there's anything I absolutely won't eat. I'm not a huge fan of slimy textures, either, like undercooked eggs (undercooked whites are the wooooorst), but overall I can choke down almost anything out of politeness if I have to, it's just a matter of foods I won't seek out. Feeding KK stuff she will actually eat is going to be a hell of a challenge once I can't smother everything in cheese anymore. ;)
Interestingly, I found out today that KK is not as far along in the process as I thought. I'm supposed to talk to the behaviourist and then do the Pre-Surgery 2 course, and she told me today that she hasn't been to Pre-Surgery 2 either, whereas I thought she had already finished that stage. It's true that she's a lot more complex a case than me both from the standpoint of her physical health and her mental health, and so I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that she's had to have several extra appointments with the dietitian, psychiatrist, and behaviourist, on top of having to undergo that course of antibiotics to get rid of the h. pylori infection she was rocking last year. She started the process in early-ish 2024, so at the rate we're going I may get ahead of her on "the path" as they like to call it.
The only thing I want to avoid is having both of us in surgical recovery at the same time. It will be bad enough when I go through the surgery, because she won't be able to help me at all (and I am rather concerned about the weight restrictions for lifting/pulling/pushing because she won't be able to help with groceries or anything else), so having her be incapacitated after surgery with me unable to help her in any way is a recipe for disaster. I have to make sure I'm as functional as possible for the most amount of time possible. It's possible that once she starts losing a substantial amount of weight she might be able to do more around the house, but I'm not banking on it. I don't think it's a realistic expectation at this point.
Anyway, I will cross that bridge when I come to it.
This weekend I'll be home for the most part, so hopefully I'll have the chance to get stuff done. Seed starting, cleaning, and a bunch of cooking and meal prep for next week.
I got to bed later than I wanted, and then an hour of sleep was cruelly torn away from me, so now I am grumpy. I managed not to let the grumpinesss affect me too much during Meeting and Meeting for Business, but that's also mostly because I just kept my mouth shut for the most part. Meeting for Business went okay, even if the person clerking seemed to be a little abrasive to me. I'm pretty sure the abrasiveness is mostly all in the eye of the beholder (i.e. me).
I've been trying not to nod off for the past hour, so I think I'll call it a night and go to bed really soon. I had a pretty productive day. I got a load of laundry done, and KK and I moved the furniture so the Roomba could do its thing, and we played both The Princess Bride and Willow back to back as a sort of comfort watch/double feature.
I keep nearly falling asleep and waking up to dozens of extra letters in my post, so it's definitely time to call it a night. I desperately need to get more sleep tonight than the rest of last week.
Good night, friends!
Another short post
Mar. 8th, 2025 10:40 pmWe toasted my mother's 88th birthday with a half-bottle of Veuve Cliquot, and then had a delicious dinner of beef brochettes, bok choy, and ratatouille, culminating in a small array of absolutely delicious French cheeses. Montreal has such good cheese, and I haven't yet found a good fromagerie here in Ottawa. I also haven't looked very hard, I must say, because KK doesn't like stinky French cheeses, and it seems like a waste to buy it just for myself.
I came home about an hour ago, and sent out the announcements for Quaker Meeting tomorrow, and soon I shall be heading upstairs to lapse into a metaphorical coma in my very comfy bed. I've had a low-grade headache lingering all day, and I am hoping that sleep and maybe a bit more Tylenol will take care of it. I had some Tylenol earlier tonight and that has taken the edge off but hasn't completely vanquished it.
Tomorrow is Meeting for Worship for Business for the Quakers, and I have volunteered to be the bearer of News That Some People Will Not Like, namely that Ministry & Counsel has decided we're going back to three hybrid Meetings a month rather than only two. The person who is clerking tomorrow is one of the few but highly vocal people who haaaaaaates the hybrid meetings, so I expect there will be some sort of psychodrama about it. How much drama will depend probably entirely on how maturely that person handles themselves, and I am not holding out a ton of hope. I am honestly a little disappointed in this person, even though I am also unsurprised given what I know about their beliefs and personality. I hope that if they are sensible and get that the sense of the Meeting is to bring people back together, they will stand aside on this issue (and also not be a prig about it).
I've also been asked to serve on Nominating Committee, which is the committee responsible for getting other people onto committees. The Committee Committee, if you will. The main reason is that all the very experienced Friends who were on it have come to the end of their term this year, and the only people who volunteered are two brand new Attenders who aren't super familiar with the Meeting and have next to no ideas about Quaker processes. So it turns out that my eleven years of being in the Meeting and also being part of Ministry and Counsel qualify me to shepherd the newbies and be part of their education. It's a little nerve-wracking, but also the people who asked me aren't entirely wrong about my understanding a good chunk of Quaker processes, at least at the level of Monthly Meeting. I am absolutely ignorant about Yearly Meeting and all of the larger parts of the Quaker organizations in Canada, but luckily we won't be dealing with them at all.
Tonight is Daylight Savings Time. *weeps quietly* Maybe now that we're in a trade war with the USA we can stop aligning ourselves with them on their time changes, or just outright get rid of DST. I hate it SO MUCH. I'd much rather have the daylight in the morning than in the evening any day of the year. We're not even "saving" daylight, the number of hours of daylight in the day don't magically increase because of it, we're just playing a weird game of Find the Queen except with artificial time markers. Bah. Another reason to go to bed as soon as possible tonight, because I am going to be feeling that lost hour of sleep for DAYS.