Disjointed Thoughts on External Validation and the Concept of "Self-Care"

Mar. 2nd, 2014 11:02 pm
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Not A Song)
It's not a secret that I really enjoy external validation. This has been part of my identity since I was a kid. While I do derive some satisfaction out of the things I do, I've always liked it better when I played to an audience. Music, writing, cooking, whatever, I never enjoyed it more than when I could share it with other people. Sure, I can cook myself a nice meal, but why would I do that when I can cook a nice meal for more than just myself, and have other people enjoy it too? What's the point of writing a story if I'm going to shove it in a drawer, literally or metaphorically?

( Cut for length )
  • Current Mood: contemplative
Tags:

Irrational and Neurotic

Dec. 18th, 2013 01:59 pm
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Deeper than swords)
I've been trying to pin down a list of all the irrational, neurotic and dysfunctional beliefs I have, and the more I think about them the more I realise there are. Ack. /o\

I'm going to try to write them down, but I may have to come back to this list and add to it as they occur to me (see previous entries about memory problems). These are in no particular order, and some of them are more sub-thoughts of the main belief system in place. IDK, I'm just thinking out loud. I'm putting them behind a cut, because I'm pretty sure no one but me wants to see what a mess my brain is.

( Neuroses behind the cut )

And that's a tour of the murky depths of my subconscious. Yeesh.

:::ETA:::

It's worth noting that I am not in any particularly deep psychological distress at the moment. I find the list depressing to look at, but I'm otherwise pretty much okay. Okay, carry on. :)
  • Current Mood: depressed
Tags:

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mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Default)
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