I wonder if I should be worried...

[mousme]

My imaginary worlds are quickly becoming more important in my life than my real world. At least, online. Luckily, I don't think I spend more time in them than I do in the real world yet, which would be a definite "Danger, Will Robinson!" sign, but I can sort of see how that might happen, one of these days.

It's so much nicer to live the life of a Jedi padawan, or even a thirteen-year-old gymnast who lives in the future, or an Air Force counterintelligence specialist, than my own life. They don't have to worry about paying the rent, or about their feelings of inadequacy or their completely stupid fears of abandonment. They have problems that are bigger than that, but that are surmountable.

My problems are all small and stupid, but I can't see a way around them, because they're my problems, in essence.

It's more fun to pretend to be other people, though. The people who live in my head live richer lives than I do. My life just isn't that exciting. I don't demand constant adventure and thrills, mind you. I'd just like... well, something more. Something more than getting up in the morning and waiting for the day to end.

Funnily enough, I'm not depressed. Not yet. I'm a bit hypomanic these days (Exhibit A: the billions of icons I've produced in the past few days), so I expect I'll come down from that soon and be well and truly depressed.

But my moods are unbalanced, as are my sleep patterns, and that's never a good sign.

Comments

[curtana.livejournal.com]

*hugs* If you need a bit of excitement in your life, you're always welcome to come visit us in Toronto. The five-hour drive isn't so bad, just a morning or an afternoon out of your day, and you could sleep on our fold-out couch and be hosted at minimum personal expense. There's a parking lot behind our building you could use for free, and we'll cook and clean for you ;) Hey, we could chip in for your gas, even, if that's a worry - I know how expensive it is at present :) We'd love you have you, anyway. Keep it in mind if you need a weekend adventure :)

[mousme.livejournal.com]

Hee!

Thanks. :)

I'll keep that in mind, and I might take you up on it, when gas prices are a wee bit lower. Apparently the OPEC countries are minded to be accommodating about that in a couple of months. At this rate, though, it'll cost me over $100 worth of gas just to get there. ^^;

Hey, if I'm lucky, I'll get a job soon which won't make me work weekends, and then I'll be free to visit! :)

[mhw.livejournal.com]

*hugs gently*

There's nothing at all wrong with finding a fantasy character's life more interesting than our day-to-day ones; that's why we invent them, after all.

Just make sure that you get the mundane things done, and then you can daydream to your heart's content.

[mina-laury.livejournal.com]

*hugs and nods*

What he said. When the world seems to be full of nothing but small chores... well, being creative with friends strikes me as one of the better ways of dealing with it.

The real world will recharge itself and be interesting again, give it time, and the thing you're waiting for with itchy feet will reveal itself, or something else will.

And then it'll give you an amazing character or plot idea. :p

[mousme.livejournal.com]

And then it'll give you an amazing character or plot idea. :p

*snigger*

Yeah, that's pretty much the way of things.

Thanks. :)

There are times...

[fearsclave.livejournal.com]

...when I wonder why we find our characters' lives more interesting than our own. Take Felix, for example. For a while, his significant other was continually trying to murder him, he was on the Great Big Secret Conspiracy That Runs Everything's Top Ten Most Wanted List, there were any number of really serious supernatural badasses who had major grudges against him, and his only friends were a bunch of flakes (albeit capable ones) and a giant purple and yellow AI that was philosophically opposed to his existence was the only entity that ever really understood him.

Between being an overweight lawyer with a nice mostly stable long-term relationship and a dog, and Felix's lot in life, I'm not sure which I'd take...

Re: There are times...

[mousme.livejournal.com]

I agree with that. My problem is, that my life right now is kind of pathetic. If I weren't 25 and jobless with seemingly no prospects, I might find my imaginary worlds less appealing.

Imaginary characters are sort of fun in a vague, theoretical way when you have a stable, comfortable life.

If my life sucked in a horrible way, like, for instance, I was homeless and lived in a cardboard box and had to scrounge in the bins behind restaurants and beg for coins, I probably wouldn't waste my time thinking about imaginary characters, either.

I'm just sort of stuck in a limbo that's not a vortex of badness, but not a nice comfortable life either.

Oh, for the record: if I were ever really given the opportunity to choose between my characters' lives and my own, I would choose my own, no matter how much I like to live through my alter egos. I wouldn't want their problems for all the money in the universe. Not only that, but it would mean giving up all the good things I have here and exchanging them for a whole bunch of bad things on the other side.

*shrug*

I am a total paradox, I admit it. I don't even seek to understand myself, at this point.

Re: There are times...

[curtana.livejournal.com]

Well, of course, as players we know that no matter how bad things get for our characters, it's still only a game. If we really were our characters, we wouldn't have that comfort.

But as someone who, at least at present, is lucky enough to have a nice comfortable life, I don't think you need to feel bad about the amount of time and energy you devote to your imaginary friends - I have twice as many Perseity characters as you, plus Terry Hates Us, Exia, and my own game which I've been working on since noon and really should still be working on right now instead of commenting on this ;)

[vureoelt.livejournal.com]

Happens to people all the time, witness the MMORPG phenomenon.

It's escapism, a vacation, fun and relaxation all bundled into one. As long as you recognize what's going on, don't blue the lines of reality and stuff, I wouldn't worry.

Really, the biggest concern seems to be that you're stuck in a rut of sorts... this might be a symptom, not necessarily the source.