I wish I'd been let in on this "secret" earlier...

[mousme]

I don't know, if someone had told me fifteen years ago that life is a process, whether I'd have believed them. At fifteen, I had this vague impression that by the time I was thirty not only would I have had everything figured out, but I'd have a home, a prestigious job (I had very different notions of that at fifteen), and a family (husband and at least one child, plus dog). Picket fence, large rose garden (I didn't know about growing veggies back then), and dinner parties once a month.

Heh.

I kind of wish I'd clued into what I really want out of life earlier than when I did. There's a span of about four or five years that I spent in my twenties having no idea about anything, and I did a lot of things which are even now contributing to sabotaging my current plans. My kingdom for a time machine, so I could go back and tell myself "This particular thing you are about to do is a Bad Plan." Mostly it's the financial decisions I made which sucked, and I don't think I would create a horrific temporal paradox by, say, NOT leasing a car at the age of 23, only a few months before quitting my job.

So these days I keep having to repeat to myself that life is a process. Process process process. In many ways I'm still that fifteen-year-old, looking around at my life and saying: "But I'm 30 now! Why hasn't it all fallen into place?" Thirty seemed like the magic "adult" number, and to a certain extent still does.

I have my act together these days, far moreso than I ever have in my entire life. I just keep having to remind myself that it's not going to happen all at once; that's just not how it works. I keep looking around and wondering why I'm not "done," and then I remember that I will never be "done." "Done" isn't a word that applies to life.

Comments

[striped.livejournal.com]

Hurrah for this post! I couldn't agree more: Life is always changing and some things always go wrong and some things right (although there are times when things in general go more right than in other times), and it's never done until you die. Now if only I would remember this!

[taxlady.livejournal.com]

Most of us have to be 30, or near that, to be able to really understand that. It's a great place to be making decisions from.

In The Hobbit people don't go from child to adolescent to adult. They go through an extra stage before becoming adults called "tweenses". I believe that lasts until ~33. Your an adult, but still learning to be an adult. There is a lot of truth in that.

[taxlady.livejournal.com]

Your an adult...

D'oh! Should have been You're an adult...

[elanya.livejournal.com]

I have a dog! That counts towards something right?

Although having a dog is a process all of its own. Cats are probably similar. She is currently napping on my bed <3

[luvenditti.livejournal.com]

I'm right there with you, dude.

[bodhifox.livejournal.com]

It is often said one should not even begin learning kabbalah until the age of 40.

[palmir.livejournal.com]

My wife was told that turning 30 means you get to kick ass and take names - you're old enough to Know Things (or so they think), but young enough to Do Things. You think of thirty as an "adult" age, and so does everyone else. At 30, you've had 9 years (er, more, in that northerly country) to be able to do everything an adult is legally able to do, and so the impression is that you have experience. You're not of the irresponsible college age any more.

Of course, I still have two more years. *sigh*

Twenties

[ankhorite.livejournal.com]

How I wish I had gotten a cat as soon as I got out of college.

I was unable to get a dog until.. 44? About that.

*sigh* Stick a fork in me, I *am* done.

PS: And it occurs to me I ought have gotten, like, a house as soon as I got out of college, too, or rather, as soon as possible after I got out. I paid rent until I was 40! Don't let this happen to you!