I'm tired, but on the whole everything seems quite positive in my life these days. I shall make another, bitter and angry post about what an asshat my supervisor is some other day.
Really, putting things into perspective, he's a minor annoyance. A small, petty, sorry excuse for a man, and I don't have much time to waste on him.
I'm really very pleased with the way my headspace is working out these days. Sure, there are lots of things I can still improve, like my tendency to procrastinate on everything I don't want to do/am nervous about, and a whole bunch of other issues.
However, for the most part I have the right mindset in which to work on all of these aspects of myself that I feel need tweaking. There's no endless self-recrimination, no auto-flagellation, no wallowing in self-fulfilling prophecies (the negative kind). I have moments of depression, and some days are far worse than others, but without fail thus far I have managed to overcome all of these without significant emotional fallout.
I have managed this for about four months now, without sign of flagging.
The main test, of course, has yet to come. I have to survive November (I don't foresee a problem there), and more importantly, January and February. January is typically a terrible month for me, in spite of it being the beginning of the New Year and my birthday. Next year, however, I have plans in the works. They are vague and unformulated right now, but they are in the works. Needless to say, I have been inspired by Tarasmas, and there is the added incentive for me to make January not suck.
I've started up a notebook, or rather I've dug out my old notebook and started over in it, in order to give myself some goals for the next few months. Some of you may recall Fearsclave's Guide to Self-Improvement for Obsessive-Compulsive Freaks. This requires a notebook and a pen and a fairly good headspace to be workable. I have all three, so I'm good to go.
To infinity, and beyond!
Really, putting things into perspective, he's a minor annoyance. A small, petty, sorry excuse for a man, and I don't have much time to waste on him.
I'm really very pleased with the way my headspace is working out these days. Sure, there are lots of things I can still improve, like my tendency to procrastinate on everything I don't want to do/am nervous about, and a whole bunch of other issues.
However, for the most part I have the right mindset in which to work on all of these aspects of myself that I feel need tweaking. There's no endless self-recrimination, no auto-flagellation, no wallowing in self-fulfilling prophecies (the negative kind). I have moments of depression, and some days are far worse than others, but without fail thus far I have managed to overcome all of these without significant emotional fallout.
I have managed this for about four months now, without sign of flagging.
The main test, of course, has yet to come. I have to survive November (I don't foresee a problem there), and more importantly, January and February. January is typically a terrible month for me, in spite of it being the beginning of the New Year and my birthday. Next year, however, I have plans in the works. They are vague and unformulated right now, but they are in the works. Needless to say, I have been inspired by Tarasmas, and there is the added incentive for me to make January not suck.
I've started up a notebook, or rather I've dug out my old notebook and started over in it, in order to give myself some goals for the next few months. Some of you may recall Fearsclave's Guide to Self-Improvement for Obsessive-Compulsive Freaks. This requires a notebook and a pen and a fairly good headspace to be workable. I have all three, so I'm good to go.
To infinity, and beyond!
no subject
Date: 2004-10-21 08:53 pm (UTC)If there's anything I can do to make Jan & Feb less fraught for you, you'll let me know, won't you?
*loves and hugs*
no subject
Date: 2004-10-22 12:39 pm (UTC)Glad to see you doing so well. :)