Only six days until I get my computer back, and a cat update

Delaney is dead. Don't you love time loops? I'm looking forward to getting my computer back so that I can work on this mission properly instead of in furtive spurts at work.

In other news, Grimshackle is actually sticking around these days. He was his usual reaction of "Fire! Fear! Foes! Flee! Aieee!" when I open the door, but he comes back pretty quickly (he's figured out that my coming heralds food) and makes nice with me.

Saash continues to be unimpressed with the fact that I am not, in fact, ai731. In fact, the visits usually go like this.

Me: *opens door* "Hello, felines! I have come to feed you."

Grimshackle: "Fire! Fear! Foes! Flee! Aieee!" *flees to the basement*

Saash: "Hello! You're a human! You must have food. Hi. Will you feed me?"

Me: *puts food in bowls* "How are you, Saash? Grimmy! Food!"

Saash: *eats* "Thank you, nice human. Oh, wait. Now that I've had food, I realise that you're not Mummy and that, in fact, I really hate you. Fuck off." *stalks off to sulk under the table*

Grimshackle: *reappears* "Hey, food! You're a nice human. Hi. You've fed me. Hi again. Will you pet me? Will you lavish affection on me and never leave me ever again?" *rubs against my ankles*

Me: "You guys get weirder every time I come."

Grimshackle: "Aieeee! Something that can't possibly hurt me! Aieeee! Fly for the hills!" *runs away to the basement*

Saash: *from under table* "You're not Mummy. Fuck off."

Me: "Fine. I'm going to work. You guys have a nice day."

Both cats: *ominous silence*

Kinda pointless navel-gazing

Many, if not most of my friends are all in the process of getting married and having children. Granted, many of my friends are a bit (but not much) older than I am, but some of them aren't.

I alternate between feeling a little bit of envy for their stability and obvious happiness, and confusion at how the hell they managed to get their shit together when I can barely manage to keep myself and four cats organised.

Also, I confess that, at least for now, I don't actually want any of that. Sure, every now and then I get a very small *ping* that says "baby!", but really, the pings are very small and I know perfectly well that I'm useless with children for more than five minutes at a time. I can't even do the standard adult-with-baby games that seem to come naturally to most people (blowing on tummies, counting toes, making faces, whatever). I just don't have that sort of knack. It doesn't bother me overmuch, either.

I also don't really want a relationship right now either. Yes, there's part of me that says that I'm going to be old and alone, but another part of me wants to know what's wrong with that scenario? I like my own company, and for the most part I always feel like a third wheel tacked on to whatever "couple" I'm hanging out with at the time (with obvious exceptions). I'm the quirky single friend now, the one who'll make your children uncomfortable in another fifteen years or so when you invite me to dinner. :P

I enjoy my independence, and while it may just be intimacy issues, I don't feel the need to complicate my existence with some sort of love life these days. I am the queen of striking out in that field anyway, and since I don't feel the burning need to "complete" myself with someone else, I figure I may as well stay by myself, at least for now.

Anyway, not entirely sure where this is going. I just sort of wanted to put something down in writing.