I want to go back to school...
May. 16th, 2005 11:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mousmeI'm at a point now where I really want to go back to university. I'm over the panicky Oh-my-God-I-suck-and-I'll-never-amount-to-anything-as-a-scholar phase I went through after I left McGill in 2002.
Not entirely over, because, really, who would I be without all my neuroses? ^_-
But over it enough that, looking back now, I realize that there was a lot of good stuff happening there. Dammit, I'm good at academic stuff, and I feel hopelessly out of place in a work environment that doesn't involve thinking at some level.
I may not end up being an academic at the end of it all. Very likely not, in fact. But I want more than what I have now in terms of education.
Getting rid of the car is a first step in that direction. It hasn't happened yet, but I'm hoping that'll all settle itself soon.
My *only* obstacle to go back to school is money. I've learned the hard way that I, personally, can't work and study at the same time. Did that for a while at university, and it was too much.
So I'd need to save up enough money for a bachelor's (I don't want to continue in literature, although I'd probably take those classes as electives just to keep myself sane and entertained), and once I get to the Master's level I can worry about grants.
Trouble is, that's a lot of money, and I just don't know where I'd get it. My parents can't afford to send me to university. Hell, my scholarships paid for three-quarters of my entire university career the first time around. The only thing that my father had to shell out for was my books, and even then I dipped considerably into my own savings to round things out.
Something to think about as time goes by. I don't want to wake up in five years and realize that I still haven't gone anywhere.
Not entirely over, because, really, who would I be without all my neuroses? ^_-
But over it enough that, looking back now, I realize that there was a lot of good stuff happening there. Dammit, I'm good at academic stuff, and I feel hopelessly out of place in a work environment that doesn't involve thinking at some level.
I may not end up being an academic at the end of it all. Very likely not, in fact. But I want more than what I have now in terms of education.
Getting rid of the car is a first step in that direction. It hasn't happened yet, but I'm hoping that'll all settle itself soon.
My *only* obstacle to go back to school is money. I've learned the hard way that I, personally, can't work and study at the same time. Did that for a while at university, and it was too much.
So I'd need to save up enough money for a bachelor's (I don't want to continue in literature, although I'd probably take those classes as electives just to keep myself sane and entertained), and once I get to the Master's level I can worry about grants.
Trouble is, that's a lot of money, and I just don't know where I'd get it. My parents can't afford to send me to university. Hell, my scholarships paid for three-quarters of my entire university career the first time around. The only thing that my father had to shell out for was my books, and even then I dipped considerably into my own savings to round things out.
Something to think about as time goes by. I don't want to wake up in five years and realize that I still haven't gone anywhere.
