Gaming stories

[mousme]

curtana has asked people to post their favourite gaming stories. I've got several, but there's one that stands out more than the others. It's not very much fun for non-gamers to hear about gaming stories, but I think there are enough gamers on my list to make this reasonably relevant.

I may post more gaming stories as the mood strikes.

You’ve probably heard my story about Capitàn Sangre already. Still, I always delight in the retelling of that particular tale. So here goes.

This was, naturally, in a Deadlands game. Deadlands features a lot of our funniest moments.

So there we were, stranded in the Great Maze (if you recall, in this game world, California fell into the sea and created a huge labyrinth of towering mesas and shark-infested waters) on a small boat, when along came a giant armoured ship of the Mexican Armada and took us prisoner.

The captain of this fine vessel was none other than El Capitàn Sangre, off of whose teeth the sunlight glinted, and who had the singular habit of posing with his hands on his hips and smiling brilliantly, no matter what was going on. (You really should watch “Captain Blood” with Errol Flynn if you haven’t already)

We were in the hold, wondering what our fate was to be. Vicky, my character, was seriously considering taking on the entire crew if only she could get her hands on a gun, but that prospect seemed unlikely. Emily the socialite had run out of explosives to use, Pete the Harrowed musician was of no use at all, and of course Bunny, the seven-foot black man who was built something like a tractor, had been clapped in as many irons as the sailors could find, just in case.

That was when Capitàn Sangre made his first fatal mistake. He challenged the NPC posse member to a sabre duel. In his defense, it made sense at the time: a sabre fight would meet the necessary requirements for swashbuckling, and make Alexandre, the NPC in question, look reasonably manly while at the same time guaranteeing that we would never get out alive. Alexandre, Vicky’s husband, was after all no great swordsman. He could hold his own, but that was about it.

Because our GM always hated having his NPCs fight each other, he allowed me to play Alexandre for the fight. Fatal mistake number two, although it wasn’t a surprising choice. In fact, it had already become established practice for me to take over that NPC during any combat, and other players got other “good” NPCs as needed.

The fight progressed as could be expected. There was a great deal of posturing and gloating and veiled threats and not-so-veiled threats, and then the duel began in earnest. Alexandre was outclassed, but I was rolling my d8’s o’ Doom, and so he was not being trounced entirely. However, it was obvious that this couldn’t last indefinitely. Something would have to tip the balance in our favour soon, or we’d all be in big trouble.

Cue fatal mistake number three.

In a grand swashbuckling gesture, the GM informed us that Capitàn Sangre took hold of a rope from the rigging (there’s always rigging in these fights), and swung out dramatically over the water in order to better swoop at Alexandre and deal the killing blow. The exchange went as follows.

“All right. Capitàn Sangre takes hold of a rope in the rigging and swings out over the water. What do you do?”

“Wait. You’re telling me you’re swinging out over the water?”

“Yeah. Why?” the GM narrowed his eyes suspiciously at me.

“You’re sure? You swing out over the water?”

“Yes, I said.”

“Okay, I cut the rope.”

“What?”

“I cut the rope.”

The GM’s face took on a pained expression. “You can’t do that!”

“Sure I can. It’s a lot easier than trying to hit a moving target, and now I can guarantee we’ll win.”

“But… it’s unsportsmanlike!”

*shrug* “Sure, but it gets the job done. Besides, Alexandre is a reformed bandit. How honourable do you think he’d be when his wife’s life is on the line?”

“Oh, fine. Go ahead. But you’d better roll a lot of damage to actually cut through with one blow.”

*roll* “Is 65 points of damage good enough?” (The irony was very heavy at this point. 65 points is a hell of a lot of damage in Deadlands)

The GM heaved a sigh of resignation, and the day was mine.


The upshot was, of course, that Capitàn Sangre fell with an undignified yelp and a splash into the murky waters of the maze, and was promptly beset by sharks. His crew pulled him out before he was torn to pieces, but let’s just say there were eye patches and hooks and wooden legs in his future.

“I cut the rope” became one of the catch-phrases of the game, too. It was fun. :)

Comments

[sandman7.livejournal.com]

Isn't that against the spirit of D&D :P

Loved the story. I would have done the same thing. All's fair in love and war.

Good for you for thinking outside the box.

Ta Ta for now.

[mousme.livejournal.com]

Isn't that against the spirit of D&D

Yes, but fair game in Deadlands. :D

Capitàn Sangre isn't slated to make an appearance in Beyond the Pale for a while yet, more's the pity.

[sorceror.livejournal.com]

Heh. "There can be only JUAN!!!

Sorry -- another gaming story. Which I think you've already heard...

[vureoelt.livejournal.com]

The infamous Dread Pirate Juan. :)

[velvetpage.livejournal.com]

Came to you via Curtana's gaming stories. This absolutely rocks. :)

[mousme.livejournal.com]

Heh. Thank you. This is definitely one of my favourite gaming stories. :)