I think I'm allergic to work
Jul. 28th, 2005 10:56 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mousmeSo here I am at work, and my throat no longer hurts since I killed it with Tylenol, but I’ve got yet another ear infection. At least it’s in my bad ear, so I don’t have to worry about any more damage there. I was feeling reasonably okay when I left the house, and it got progressively worse as I got closer to work. Thus, I’m concluding that I’m allergic to this place.
Met t! on the way to the metro today. Or, rather, he sneaked up behind me while I was reading, and I only became aware of his presence when he slowed down to walk beside me. I pay only a minimal amount of attention to my surroundings when I read and walk: enough to know when things come up in my peripheral vision so that I don’t bump into people/lamp posts, or walk straight out into traffic when the light’s red.
We had a fun talk about books and music and something called the Gong Show, which made me want to bring a gong to work (t!’s suggestion for when the CAM gets out of hand with her bad jokes).
The CAM, I have discovered (not recently, but I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned it before), has the sense of humour of a ten-year-old boy who’s overdosed on sugar. This is the conversation (slightly abbreviated) that we had yesterday.
CAM: *to me and L* “Don’t you think we’re all on top of each other since we moved?”
L: “It’s pretty much the same thing we had before, except with nicer desks.”
Me: *cracks up* (I was really tired, and we’ve been having space issues, don’t ask)
CAM: “No, it feels different! We’re all right next to each other now. You can’t even fart without everyone hearing it!” *collapses at her own joke*
Me and L: *shrug*
CAM: “Okay, anyway, I need you to messenger this to Grant Butt.” *giggles* “Yeah, I said ‘butt’ but that’s his name!” *guffaws*
Me: *takes the papers and prepares a label* “Okay, [CAM’s name].”
[I should note here that Grant Butt has been working with the department for years and that this is certainly not the first time we’ve sent him anything.]
CAM: “Get it? It’s his name!” *goes on at length on this topic*
Me: “Yes, I get it. What else do you need?” [This because I know from experience that if she’s still hanging around, she wants something else.]
CAM: “Geez, you have no sense of humour! Anyway, I need you to type up a memo to Grant Butt to put on the thing that I’m sending. Do we have any memo paper?”
Me: *nods* “Absolutely. Right here in the computer. We even have some formatted under your name.”
CAM: “Great!” *dictates memo in her own inimitable style, which means she paraphrases and I make it sound like English* “Did you get that?”
Me: “Yup.”
CAM: “Yeah. So put that on memo paper. I want to add some class to the thing I’m sending. Make it look classy.”
Me: *bites tongue very hard*
L: *perfectly deadpan* “Whatever we can do to add class to your work, [CAM’s name].”
Me: *dies*
CAM: *blithely oblivious* “Fantastic! Let me know when you’re done.” *sails off back to her office*
Me and L: *headdesk*
Met t! on the way to the metro today. Or, rather, he sneaked up behind me while I was reading, and I only became aware of his presence when he slowed down to walk beside me. I pay only a minimal amount of attention to my surroundings when I read and walk: enough to know when things come up in my peripheral vision so that I don’t bump into people/lamp posts, or walk straight out into traffic when the light’s red.
We had a fun talk about books and music and something called the Gong Show, which made me want to bring a gong to work (t!’s suggestion for when the CAM gets out of hand with her bad jokes).
The CAM, I have discovered (not recently, but I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned it before), has the sense of humour of a ten-year-old boy who’s overdosed on sugar. This is the conversation (slightly abbreviated) that we had yesterday.
CAM: *to me and L* “Don’t you think we’re all on top of each other since we moved?”
L: “It’s pretty much the same thing we had before, except with nicer desks.”
Me: *cracks up* (I was really tired, and we’ve been having space issues, don’t ask)
CAM: “No, it feels different! We’re all right next to each other now. You can’t even fart without everyone hearing it!” *collapses at her own joke*
Me and L: *shrug*
CAM: “Okay, anyway, I need you to messenger this to Grant Butt.” *giggles* “Yeah, I said ‘butt’ but that’s his name!” *guffaws*
Me: *takes the papers and prepares a label* “Okay, [CAM’s name].”
[I should note here that Grant Butt has been working with the department for years and that this is certainly not the first time we’ve sent him anything.]
CAM: “Get it? It’s his name!” *goes on at length on this topic*
Me: “Yes, I get it. What else do you need?” [This because I know from experience that if she’s still hanging around, she wants something else.]
CAM: “Geez, you have no sense of humour! Anyway, I need you to type up a memo to Grant Butt to put on the thing that I’m sending. Do we have any memo paper?”
Me: *nods* “Absolutely. Right here in the computer. We even have some formatted under your name.”
CAM: “Great!” *dictates memo in her own inimitable style, which means she paraphrases and I make it sound like English* “Did you get that?”
Me: “Yup.”
CAM: “Yeah. So put that on memo paper. I want to add some class to the thing I’m sending. Make it look classy.”
Me: *bites tongue very hard*
L: *perfectly deadpan* “Whatever we can do to add class to your work, [CAM’s name].”
Me: *dies*
CAM: *blithely oblivious* “Fantastic! Let me know when you’re done.” *sails off back to her office*
Me and L: *headdesk*
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GONGGGGGGGGGGggggggggg!
Date: 2005-07-28 04:05 pm (UTC)Then a semi was coming right for me. I almost shit myself.
Oh wait, I subsequently realised, this semi is parked, and it appeared to be bearing down on me because I was walking.
Lesson learned.
t!
Re: GONGGGGGGGGGGggggggggg!
Date: 2005-07-28 04:20 pm (UTC)Poor you. That must have taken a year or two off your life, at least.
Luckily, I've lived downtown almost all my life and thus, for the most part, am able to tell the difference between A) people/things that won't affect me in the near future, B) people/things I might bump into, and C)people/things that are about to run me down.
This works about 90% of the time. The other 10% usually involves me doing a last-minute quickstep around someone's leashed dog, or looking up just in time before hitting a phone pole.
no subject
Date: 2005-07-28 05:23 pm (UTC)Re: GONGGGGGGGGGGggggggggg!
Date: 2005-07-28 05:54 pm (UTC)Luckily, I've lived downtown almost all my life and thus, for the most part, am able to tell the difference between A) people/things that won't affect me in the near future, B) people/things I might bump into, and C)people/things that are about to run me down.
The only thing however I have to add to that statement is that there are certain people that without realising it, try to move out of the way when they notice me coming towards them, nose in book, but by moving, cause me to almost crash in them...
no subject
Date: 2005-07-28 06:16 pm (UTC)So one day I bring them to the top of the escalator, leave them to the side of said escalator and go get food, the thinking being that I'm breaking up the monotony a little. And also that I'm hungry.
Not ten minutes later I come back into the building, food in one hand and open book in the other, reading away, gliding over the escalator and -- you guessed it -- trip with slapsticky goodness right over the MOUNTAIN of papers and land on my elbows and face on the other side of the pile.
Honest to god, I never bump into things when I'm reading and walking unless, of course, they're obstacles I've set for myself.
no subject
Date: 2005-07-28 08:29 pm (UTC)Re: GONGGGGGGGGGGggggggggg!
Date: 2005-07-28 08:31 pm (UTC)It's not their fault, but it's still annoying.
Re: GONGGGGGGGGGGggggggggg!
Date: 2005-08-02 03:23 am (UTC)