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StupidgoddamnedbipolardisorderIhateitIhateitIhateit!
Yes, I'm depressed. Bite me and go to hell! Oh, did I just say that out loud? (Or write it out loud)
*kicks a wall petulantly*
Cranky to boot. Lovely.
Yes, world, here I am in all my unglory.
I don't feel like leaving home today, but the rational part of me is telling me I'll feel much better if I go out and force myself to be social with my parents' friends. Hell, there'll probably even be dessert, and that's never a bad thing.
It's just right now I feel like curling up in a ball under a piece of large furniture and never coming out again. I may even take a stuffed animal with me and suck my thumb, and wish the whole world would leave me alone.
Sadly, I don't have that "luxury." I have to get dressed, get myself organised, put on a happy face and go out to dinner. Then I have to get up in the morning and go to work so I don't starve. I don't know how I do it every day, honestly I don't. Somehow, the show must go on.
It's a lucky thing I don't even have the spare cash to buy razor blades. Or that I'm at least rational enough to tell myself I don't really have the money for that.
Otherwise, I'm pretty sure I'd go back to taking the "easy" way out and just cutting the shit out of my arm.
Yes, I'm depressed. Bite me and go to hell! Oh, did I just say that out loud? (Or write it out loud)
*kicks a wall petulantly*
Cranky to boot. Lovely.
Yes, world, here I am in all my unglory.
I don't feel like leaving home today, but the rational part of me is telling me I'll feel much better if I go out and force myself to be social with my parents' friends. Hell, there'll probably even be dessert, and that's never a bad thing.
It's just right now I feel like curling up in a ball under a piece of large furniture and never coming out again. I may even take a stuffed animal with me and suck my thumb, and wish the whole world would leave me alone.
Sadly, I don't have that "luxury." I have to get dressed, get myself organised, put on a happy face and go out to dinner. Then I have to get up in the morning and go to work so I don't starve. I don't know how I do it every day, honestly I don't. Somehow, the show must go on.
It's a lucky thing I don't even have the spare cash to buy razor blades. Or that I'm at least rational enough to tell myself I don't really have the money for that.
Otherwise, I'm pretty sure I'd go back to taking the "easy" way out and just cutting the shit out of my arm.
no subject
Date: 2003-04-13 08:38 pm (UTC)*hands Phnee a blankie and well worn teddy bear* Run. I'll tell them I don't know where you went but you aren't available right now.
Hope you feel better soon.