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Think Happy Thoughts
Sep. 20th, 2019 12:55 pmI finally got the Basement of Horrible Cat Pee professionally clean. It's now looking horrific but smelling a million times better. It also cost a bloody fortune, and I am... well, not exactly broke, but definitely back to paycheck to paycheck, juggling bill payments, and constantly worried something, somewhere, is going to bounce and send me into a spiral of late fees. Part of this is justified, and part of this is just my usual hang-ups about money. I should have some overtime payments coming in in about a month or six weeks, so if I just hang on until then, things should get a little less tight, budget-wise.
To be fair, I have been doing some unwise spending, especially when it comes to groceries, of all things. I've been feeling more than a little overwhelmed with everything, and that tends to make me go for convenience, rather than the stuff that would take me time and energy to cook, and unfortunately convenience around here costs about twice as much as I would normally pay to feed myself.
I'm really enjoying my Master's level courses so far. I have good professors, and both the readings and the course material are super interesting. I really hope I'm able to keep up and do reasonably well. I need to have a good GPA in order to be allowed to write a Master's thesis, otherwise I'll have to produce a smaller, directed study, and take a lot more courses, which I'd rather not do (although the unstructured aspect of writing a thesis is pretty terrifying to me, the queen of procrastination).
Anyway, I am sort of robbing Peter to pay Paul these days in the sleep department. I'm trying to get all my mediation courses done before Christmas so I can start to get actual experience under my belt, but I only have so much time I can take off work, so I'm having to go to class directly after my night shifts, which is... suboptimal to say the least. I don't seem to have much choice in the matter, though: we're so short-staffed that my work is threatening to cancel the leave I've already requested (they refuse to authorize overtime to cover university courses, which is actually bullshit because they're not really entitled to know why I'm taking leave), which would mean I can't go to class and would automatically fail my semester, thus flushing $3,500 I can't afford down the drain.
So to say this is all causing a great deal of anxiety would be putting it mildly. I've requested an appointment to see my doctor, but the earliest I could get was October 2nd, and even then I'm pretty sure she can't medicate my management out of existence.
In the meantime, Canada has declared elections, things are in full swing, and I want to crawl under a rock and die. We're ten days in, and we've got another month of this bullshit. I am pretty sure we're in for a Conservative minority in the government, and while the previous Conservative government was not my favourite, the current Conservative party have leaned considerably more to the right, and are actively anti-LGBTQ+ and are likely to re-open what they call the "abortion debate." So, you know, if they get elected, and God forbid, with a majority, we can all kiss our freedoms goodbye. People are saying it can't happen, but several provinces, including my own, have voted in some pretty horrifying right wing governments in the past couple of years.
I really hope Canada doesn't turn into a mini trash fire version of the USA's dumpster fire, but I guess we'll find out on October 21st. *siiiiiiiiiigh*
There's more, but I am looking at the time, and I really need to nap before my night shift. See above: getting enough sleep. If work is reasonably calm tonight, I may post again later, while I still have the motivation.
To be fair, I have been doing some unwise spending, especially when it comes to groceries, of all things. I've been feeling more than a little overwhelmed with everything, and that tends to make me go for convenience, rather than the stuff that would take me time and energy to cook, and unfortunately convenience around here costs about twice as much as I would normally pay to feed myself.
I'm really enjoying my Master's level courses so far. I have good professors, and both the readings and the course material are super interesting. I really hope I'm able to keep up and do reasonably well. I need to have a good GPA in order to be allowed to write a Master's thesis, otherwise I'll have to produce a smaller, directed study, and take a lot more courses, which I'd rather not do (although the unstructured aspect of writing a thesis is pretty terrifying to me, the queen of procrastination).
Anyway, I am sort of robbing Peter to pay Paul these days in the sleep department. I'm trying to get all my mediation courses done before Christmas so I can start to get actual experience under my belt, but I only have so much time I can take off work, so I'm having to go to class directly after my night shifts, which is... suboptimal to say the least. I don't seem to have much choice in the matter, though: we're so short-staffed that my work is threatening to cancel the leave I've already requested (they refuse to authorize overtime to cover university courses, which is actually bullshit because they're not really entitled to know why I'm taking leave), which would mean I can't go to class and would automatically fail my semester, thus flushing $3,500 I can't afford down the drain.
So to say this is all causing a great deal of anxiety would be putting it mildly. I've requested an appointment to see my doctor, but the earliest I could get was October 2nd, and even then I'm pretty sure she can't medicate my management out of existence.
In the meantime, Canada has declared elections, things are in full swing, and I want to crawl under a rock and die. We're ten days in, and we've got another month of this bullshit. I am pretty sure we're in for a Conservative minority in the government, and while the previous Conservative government was not my favourite, the current Conservative party have leaned considerably more to the right, and are actively anti-LGBTQ+ and are likely to re-open what they call the "abortion debate." So, you know, if they get elected, and God forbid, with a majority, we can all kiss our freedoms goodbye. People are saying it can't happen, but several provinces, including my own, have voted in some pretty horrifying right wing governments in the past couple of years.
I really hope Canada doesn't turn into a mini trash fire version of the USA's dumpster fire, but I guess we'll find out on October 21st. *siiiiiiiiiigh*
There's more, but I am looking at the time, and I really need to nap before my night shift. See above: getting enough sleep. If work is reasonably calm tonight, I may post again later, while I still have the motivation.
