It's an interesting experiment - not so much on your friends, but on yourself. And I agree with the conclusions that you've come to - that being said, I also tend to view what constitutes a friendship differently than some people. Or, maybe not what constitutes it, but what actions are required/not-required to maintain it.
I didn't notice you were gone, but I think that's a reflection more on how *I* use social media (and how the human default is to assume that everyone is like you.) I'm on twitter all the time, but rarely tweet unless in reply to someone. And while I know rationally that you tend to tweet more consistently, I think if anyone had said "Hey, where's mousme?", I would have said, "oh, I'm sure she's around and just replying to people that I don't follow." (Your absence on FB could have easily been explained by a)the fact that I don't think you are very active on there anyway? b)FB algorithms often hide my friends from me)
Friendship is a funny thing. I mean, my BFF and I sometimes go more than three weeks without speaking, actually OFTEN do so, and we don't even really notice... but we'd both walk through fire for each other and we both know that we love each other very much.
Basically, if I feel that when I need someone and call out to them, they'll be there and I know that I'd be there for them too, then that's all that matters to me.
Also, that I know that when we DO have our one conversation per year, you'll "get" me and be understanding and non-judgmental, and we'll have a good time... then that's good. Basic stuff like that doesn't change week to week, so, it's more that friendship is something I see as existing on some base level, regardless if I speak to you everyday, once a year, or once every five years - everything else is just catching up.
That all being said, I've also had a really shitty month - so, another reason I probably didn't notice you were gone was because on most days in the past three weeks, it was a miracle if I noticed whether it was a nice day or if there was any point to life at all.
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Date: 2016-02-29 12:13 am (UTC)I didn't notice you were gone, but I think that's a reflection more on how *I* use social media (and how the human default is to assume that everyone is like you.) I'm on twitter all the time, but rarely tweet unless in reply to someone. And while I know rationally that you tend to tweet more consistently, I think if anyone had said "Hey, where's mousme?", I would have said, "oh, I'm sure she's around and just replying to people that I don't follow." (Your absence on FB could have easily been explained by a)the fact that I don't think you are very active on there anyway? b)FB algorithms often hide my friends from me)
Friendship is a funny thing. I mean, my BFF and I sometimes go more than three weeks without speaking, actually OFTEN do so, and we don't even really notice... but we'd both walk through fire for each other and we both know that we love each other very much.
Basically, if I feel that when I need someone and call out to them, they'll be there and I know that I'd be there for them too, then that's all that matters to me.
Also, that I know that when we DO have our one conversation per year, you'll "get" me and be understanding and non-judgmental, and we'll have a good time... then that's good. Basic stuff like that doesn't change week to week, so, it's more that friendship is something I see as existing on some base level, regardless if I speak to you everyday, once a year, or once every five years - everything else is just catching up.
That all being said, I've also had a really shitty month - so, another reason I probably didn't notice you were gone was because on most days in the past three weeks, it was a miracle if I noticed whether it was a nice day or if there was any point to life at all.