mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Dead Baby Possum)
mousme ([personal profile] mousme) wrote2007-02-01 10:31 am

My days are getting away from me...

Once again, I have found myself in that weird place I swore I'd leave behind, in which I have no time for anything anymore. No time and no energy.

Because of my job, I've had to cut back my social stuff almost 90%. Other commitments I thought would be over by now are stretching out, and might still be here by summertime, by the looks of it. As much as I enjoy these things, I can't help but just feel tired thinking about it. My weekends go by in a blur of engagements and obligations (ones I enjoy, but obligations nonetheless), and when Monday comes I'm still exhausted and have ten thousand things left to do.

The apartment is still clean, but I need to give it some serious attention in some areas. Starting Monday I'll be going to the YMCA three times a week, and once more for yoga, which means my mornings will be halved in terms of time, and that'll leave me with *one* free morning a week in which to do all the Other Stuff that needs to be done during the week (because I usually don't have time on the weekends).

Also, I'm tired. I go to bed and I'm tired. I wake up and I'm still tired Part of this is the usual starting-a-new-job tiredness that usually stays with me for three or four months until I settle down properly into the routine. Except that there's more to it. I haven't actually felt properly rested since August of 2006. There was that bout of Mystery Tired™, which started at the beginning of August. Then I started work at Dial-A-Husband, and while I had plenty of nervous energy because of New Job Stress™, I was constantly exhausted (and I do mean exhausted: I could barely muster the energy to make myself food and go to bed on most days). Of course, I was working 50 to 60-hour weeks, so I attributed it to that. Then November was NaNoWriMo, which means being tired is par for the course, and then in December I started a new job (again), and my entire schedule shifted *twice*.

So I don't know if the fact that I constantly feel drained now is just residual stuff from having two new jobs in a short period of time, or if there's something more going on that I've simply ignored since August, or what.

There are also other things I want to do, but I don't know when I'll ever be able to conjure the time to do them.

Anyway, I don't know what to do about any of this. I'm just whining, I guess. Don't mind me.

[identity profile] mousme.livejournal.com 2007-02-01 04:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, I'm definitely overextending myself. The problem is, even my attempts to disengage from the stuff that's been draining have failed miserably so far.

I'm going to make another concerted effort to reduce the number of commitments I have. It doesn't look like much from the outside (at least, not to me), but my current work schedule doesn't allow for much these days.

*sigh*

I hope it's a passing phase too.

[identity profile] pasley.livejournal.com 2007-02-01 04:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Is there the possibility of a schedule change for your job some time down the line, or is it the night shift or nothing?

[identity profile] mousme.livejournal.com 2007-02-01 04:54 pm (UTC)(link)
Not much chance right now. I'm doing "swing shift," which means 2:30pm to 10:30pm, which actually suits me in terms of my own rhythms. I tend to be an early-ish riser (when I follow my own natural patterns, I tend to go to bed around 10 or 11pm and get up around 6am, supposing nothing else goes awry), and I enjoy having my mornings to get stuff done.

The only disadvantage of the shift means that my evenings are always shot in terms of anything other than work.

I honestly don't know if I *want* a different shift right now. What's killing me is the fact that I have no real down time, especially on weekends. So I think I shall have to regroup and re-evaluate what I want to do about that.