The Great Limerick Challenge

[mousme]

Okay, folks. As some of you may know, I'm a complete limerick fiend, and I want to make a compilation to fuel my obsession.

So, I want you to post all your favourite limericks right here. If you have friends who aren't on my list or who have no LJs, point them here too. :)

There is no limit to the number of limericks anyone should post. In fact, I encourage you to post as many as you can think of. Feel free to make some up, too.

Have at it!

Comments

[elanya.livejournal.com]

a clip form a longer limerick poem called 'Socially Conscious Pornography'

We've socially conscious biography
Esthetics, and social geography.
But today every firled
Boasts it Marxian yield,
So now there's class-conscious pornography

Oh the worker is nobody's fool
For by rights he's the man with the tool.
His ponderous prick'll
Arise with the scickle
And bugger the Fascists who rule

----

The was a young girl of East Lynne
Whose mother, to save her from sin
Had filled up her crack
To the brim with shellac,
But the boys picked it out with a pin.

-----------

When a lecherous curate at Leeds
Was discovered, one day, in the weed
Astride a young nun,
He said, "Christ, this is fun!
Far better than telling one's beads!"

-----------

A fellow whose surname was Hunt
Trained his cock to perform a slick stunt
This versitile spout
Could be turned inside out
Like a glove, and be used as a cunt.

-----------

There was a young lady named Smith
Whose virtue was largely a myth
She said "Try as I can,"
I can't find a man
Who it's fun to be virtuous with!"

-----------

There was a young lady at sea
Who said "God, how it hurts me to pee."
"I see," said the mate,
"That accounts for the state
Of the captain, the purser, and me!"

-----------

The was a young lady from Cue
Who filled her vagina with glue
She said with a grin
"If they pay to get in,
They'll pay to get out of it too!"

------------

....and finally, here is one for Rainero!

A young man with a passion quite vast
used to talk about making it last
Till one day he discovered
His sister uncovered
And now he fucks often -- and fast!