Why birthdays and holidays? There's nothing particularly physiological about those dates that changes you, so why make a physiological "correction" in yourself when it's not you that's the problem? Why are you chemically bending yourself when you could bend the stressors for your convenience, instead? Why is it that it apparently everyone (including you) feels that it is you who must be managed, and not your circumstances? Just curious. I don't want to sound insensitive, but you make it sound like such a risk to yourself, and I'm wondering if there are any options you haven't considered for changing your stressing circumstances instead of changing you, and risking getting hurt.