mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (A Little Worship)

Clearly, it's not working for me. I used to post to LJ a million times a day, but that was before Twitter gave me an outlet for all those random thoughts that pop into my head that I feel compelled to share with the world. ;)

So nowadays I wait until I feel I have something of substance to say in order to post here, but let's face it, I rarely have anything of substance to say these days. It's all fleeting thoughts and superficial impressions, all the time!

Volunteering and Google Alert Weirdness! )

Rambling about routines and health and sleep and stuff )

I think later this week I'll make a more upbeat post with all the new projects I want to do in my copious amounts of spare time. Those are a lot more fun than all this whining about being tired and out of shape and not having enough time or energy to do things. So, an upbeat post to look forward to!

This has been a rambly, long-winded post. Thank you for bearing with me as I basically process everything in my head out loud. ;)

mousme: A text icon, dark green text on pale green, that reads There is no normal life. There's just life. (No Normal Life)
I promised I would update on all the things, and then never did so. So, uh, I'm going to try to do this succinctly. I will very likely fail at that too. Succinctness (succinctitude?) has never been my forte, as you all know. ;)

Update behind the cut! )
I think that's it for now. Thank you for bearing with me if you made it past that wall of text. ;)
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Carpet Ship)
The universe rewarded me for turning 36 with a wicked bout of vertigo in the middle of my night shift, which I was working alone. So I had to call my boss in disgrace for the second time in six months and crawl home and wait for death, but not before I ended up puking in the trash can at work because I couldn't make it to the bathroom. It was extra humiliating. /o\ I also had to cancel my first ever volunteer session at Shepherds of Good Hope, which also sucked.

So things are a little like my icon, but without the vodka, and it's not nearly as fun as it looks.

I spent today curled up with my laptop, posted some fanfiction and took a nap. I also did dishes, so that today wouldn't be a total write-off. I'm scheduled to have a Skype chat with my parents later on too, which will be nice. The world has (mostly) stopped spinning, and moving doesn't make me throw up anymore, so that's a win. :)

Now seems like as good a time as any to talk about my plans for the year. I've decided not to do "resolutions" in the traditional sense of the word. That being said, I do have a lot on my plate for the foreseeable future.

2015 behind the cut! )

Anyway, that concludes my lengthy rambling about what I have in mind for the year. I'd promise to post more, but that's probably a lie. I seem to go through phases when I post a lot, and others in which I post only sporadically or not at all, and I think I'll just stick to that. I'll post when I feel I have something of value to share, and that will have to suffice.

Happy New Year again, everyone!
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (George (tongue))
I wasn't up all night, but it feels like it. I made poor life choices and decided I would stay up to watch Hannibal, which continues to delight me. However, at 21:30 my landlady walked through the door, so not only did I stay up past my bedtime but I didn't even get to reap the rewards of my poor life choices. I am bitter about this. Also tired.

I had a visually pretty intense dream right before awakening. Dream behind the cut. It gets a little gory, be warned. )

Aside from horrifically bloody dreams, yesterday was pretty good overall. I walked during my lunch break and had another delicious mason jar salad for lunch. I'm still working on the food/better nutrition thing. I thought I was doing okay yesterday, since last week I'd brought too much food to work with me. By the time I got home last night, though, I was very hungry and thus overdid it a little at dinner. So I'm going to have to tweak the amount of food I bring to work with me so I'll have something to eat later in the afternoon. Apparently all my willpower goes to hell in the evening/at the end of the day, which at least is consistent with studies on willpower. I just have to work on not needing to rely on willpower to get me through the last few hours of the day. More on that when I figure it out, I guess.

My coworker is back from his sick leave, but he's only back part-time. He'll be here during the week, four hours a day only, at least until the end of June. So I still get my nights and weekends to myself, which is pretty keen. It's a win for me for now, though my boss has made noises about moving someone over to my shift, which is not as awesome. I don't feel a particular affinity for either of the two guys he's thinking of putting with me, and I'd honestly rather be left to my own devices at work rather than have to learn to work with another partner. That being said, I'm paid to work here, so if that means learning to work with a new partner, so be it.

Since I'm alone this weekend I'll have to do my walking after work, which is fine. It just means I'll have to make sure I get out there and walk when I get home, rather than collapse in a puddle. See above: less willpower at the end of the day.

The yoga has also not happened yet, due to my poor life choices/going to bed too late. I have at least found a nice yoga-for-beginners routine that seems doable. Oh, and before I forget, I should think about the things I am grateful for today:

1- Bananas. No, seriously. Yummy, portable, not messy, and a great source of potassium. Also, it sounds funny when you say it a lot. Bananas!

2- I am grateful that I live in a place in which food is not only plentiful but generally inexpensive and nutritious and comes in a variety that many people can only dream of.

3- I got interrupted by work before I could get to #3, so I guess I'll say I am grateful that I have work to do that I find rewarding.

And that's it for now. Stay tuned for more riveting updates. Possibly with less blood next time.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Meer!)
Sorry, been AFK for a few days. Since Sunday, at the very least. It's been a bit of a busy week, what with Easter and Bean having the Gastro That Would Not Go Away, though [livejournal.com profile] pdaughter is the one who ended up dealing with the latter for the better part of the week, as I had to head back to Ottawa for work on Tuesday afternoon. I suppose that, aside from that, it hasn't been much busier than usual, though it felt that way.

Cut for complaining )

Food! And also nutrition! And general health stuff! )
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Not A Song)
I had a very, very busy week last week. I got a chance to work an OT shift and jumped on it, because 12 hours at double time is not something I can afford to refuse. Alas, that meant another two commute days and even less free time than usual, and I ended up letting LJ slide. In situations like that something's gotta give, and blogging gave.

I did go see the doctor last Wednesday, and although the appointment felt very rushed (when I asked for five more minutes to discuss something she squirmed and sheepishly refused), overall I think it went well. Though now I know that when my doctor books "an hour" what she really means is that I'll wait for her for 15 minutes, we'll get about 15 minutes together, and the other 30 minutes are just for show.

She had blood taken for various tests, including a thyroid function test, and I'll find out in about two months what that's about. Having a doctor beats not having one, but I am not enjoying this two-months-between-all-appointments schedule. I was hoping to get this figured out in January, not in June.

You'll be pleased to know that I got all my immunisation boosters while I was there. I am contributing to herd immunity! The doctor tried to tell me that vaccinations were important, and then got treated to my usual rant about people who don't vaccinate their kids, and we both had a good laugh about it. My left arm is still bruised all to hell, though. I think the nurse nicked a vein going in. :/

So for the moment it's more waiting to see if there's anything actually wrong with me, or if I just need to find a ladder and get over myself and stop being such a whiner.

Bean and I went to the park on Sunday before I had to go to work, and had a great time. I haven't had the chance to transfer the pictures over onto my computer, but if you follow me on Facebook there are a few there. Otherwise you'll just have to take my word for it. ;) The last time I took him to the park was in the late fall, and it was amazing to see how much he'd grown since then. Things he couldn't reach six months ago were well within his grasp this time, and there was no question but that he'd sit on the "big kid" swings. He did forget to hold on at one point while I pushed him (gently) and ended up sort of faceplanting into the sand, but he was more shocked than hurt, and after a couple of tears he was off and running again. He refused to slide down any of the slides because they were wet from the early morning rain, but he happily straddled a soaking wet see-saw, so I'm not sure what the difference was in his mind. Either way, the water dried quite quickly.

He wanted to go for "one long walk" after that, but approximately ten seconds later jumped feet first into the deepest puddle he could find. Given that he'd insisted on wearing his canvas shoes to the park, that put the kibosh on the walk pretty quickly, much to his disappointment. It was simply too chilly out to allow him to walk around with wet feet for long. It was also nearing lunchtime, so his attempt to negotiate going home to get his boots and then go on a walk also met with failure. It was a frustrating time for him, though perhaps next time he'll agree either to wear boots or not to jump in puddles. We shall see.

I've been completely slammed at work this week. Just busy-busy-busy, and it doesn't look like it's going to let up anytime soon. I'll try to be more diligent about updating, though.

Hey, if you're lucky, I might make another update about television! I know everyone loves it when I ramble on endlessly about my TV-watching habits.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Anatomically Impossible)
I thought I had taken an appointment for a check-up. Turns out, the first appointment with this doctor/family clinic is considered a "meet and greet." I was pretty disappointed. For one thing, no hors d'oeuvres, no cheese, no crackers, no veggies and dip, and no drinks. For a meet and greet, it was seriously sub-par. :P

The verdict is "come back in two months and we'll address it then," which was quite frankly not the response I was hoping for. Still, at least it's going to be addressed? Mostly this appointment was about paperwork and taking my non-existent family medical history. It's always funny to see the look on doctors' faces when I tell them I have no family medical history to give them. Closed adoptions will do that, yo.

I suppose that in the grand scheme of things, two months isn't too long to wait, especially considering how long I went without a gp at all. It's because I got my hopes up that things were actually going to move forward, and having to wait another two months before we even begin to acknowledge that there's a problem is demoralising. Another two months of brain fog and pissing off [livejournal.com profile] pdaughter because I can't keep things straight in my mind and making stupid mistakes at work, and after that even more time while we wait for test results, which the doctor indicated she would probably do when the time comes.

*sigh*

Well, I'm not the only person with troubles, and mine are lesser than most, so I guess I shouldn't complain. It's just a little frustrating to still be denied answers after all this time.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Repress Someone Else)
Night shift today, thus marking the halfway point of my work week.

I ended up leaving work early yesterday and spending the rest of the afternoon and evening curled up under blankets with a lot of chamomile tea, as I felt like utter crap. Luckily, whatever gastro-type bug this was decided that three days of unpleasantness was enough, and so far today I feel fine. *knocks on wood*

Perhaps my body remembered that I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon for the first time in... I don't actually remember how long. Quebec being what it is, after my last gp died, I had no gp at all and no way to get one. A CLSC in Quebec will help you get a gp if you're pregnant or have just given birth, or if you have some sort of long-term illness, or if you've just been discharged from the hospital after a serious illness or surgery. Since none of these apply to me, I had a snowball's chance in hell of ever getting a doctor.

Now that I'm covered under OHIP (Ontario medicare), I looked around for a gp and lo, I got one on the very first try. So in an hour and a half I shall actually be talking with an honest-to-goodness doctor about some of my health concerns. I very much hope that she turns out to be one of those doctors who actually listens and isn't simply trying to get all her patients through the door as quickly as possible. My previous gp was a guy I inherited from my parents (metaphorically speaking), and he was a bit of a misogynistic tool whose answer to everything was that I needed to lose weight. Migraines? I should drop a few pounds. Anaemia? I should do something about that belly fat. Bipolar disorder? Maybe I wouldn't be as crazy if I was a size eight. Okay, I'm exaggerating for effect, but it was a lot like that. He was constantly vexed to find that my blood pressure was just fine, that I had no incipient diabetes, that my knees weren't suffering, that I was basically a very healthy fat person. I think he wanted to find something wrong with me that he could attribute to my being obese, but he never did. My health problems stubbornly refused to be linked to my weight, all my life. Or else he would treat me like I was neurotic and had no basis for any of my concerns.

Actually, I guess what I'm hoping for is a doctor who won't dismiss everything I say or railroad me about my weight. I do have concerns about my weight, but it's more that I've been gaining weight rapidly lately with no reasonable explanation for how quickly it's happening. There's also the fatigue, the splitting nails, the hair loss (that's a lot of fun, let me tell you—good thing I have lots of it to spare for the moment), and last but certainly not least, the memory problems.

I will confess to being worried that I'm going to be told it's not due to anything, that it just sucks to be me and that I need to sleep more and be less stressed (neither of which is going to happen—I get as much sleep as my schedule & lifestyle will allow, and my current stress levels are about as good as they're going to get).

On that note, I need to cut this short. I have just enough time for a shower before I need to get cracking for this appointment. See you on the flip side!
mousme: A text icon, dark green text on pale green, that reads There is no normal life. There's just life. (No Normal Life)
I'm pretty sure I had some interesting dreams last night, but I don't remember them now. I had a pretty broken night of sleep due to a mystery stomach upset. It started right after I left home on Sunday, and I attributed it to something I had eaten that was maybe a little off, but now it's been two days or so, so I guess it must be a bug of some kind. It's been mild enough so far, just really inconvenient and not a little unpleasant, but it seems to be a little worse today. Or possibly a lot worse. Right now I'm a little worried I won't make it to the end of my shift.

On an up note, I finally have my doctor's appointment tomorrow afternoon. I've been looking forward to this since I first took the appointment in January. Maybe now I'll be able to get some answers about why my body and my brain have decided they hate me and want nothing to do with being functional. It would be really nice to be able to remember things from one day to the next, and to not have to worry about whether I'll fit in my clothes in another month or two. All that good stuff.

I don't have much to report today, alas, apart from feeling slightly under the weather. I did manage to switch shifts with a coworker, so I am free and clear for Bean's birthday, which is great.

And that's pretty much it for now. Maybe I'll think of something else to say later.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (White People)
After being off the bandwagon for a year, I'm getting back up on the horse, in order to properly mix my metaphors. ;)

First off, I'm going back to healthy eating, roughly following the guidelines of the Paleo diet. I will let [livejournal.com profile] fearsclave extoll its virtues to you at length. For me, suffice it to say that the idea of eating mostly fruit, vegetables and sources of protein seems like a pretty healthy choice.

Also, at [livejournal.com profile] fearsclave's prompting, I signed up for Fitocracy, which so far is quite a lot of fun. The basic idea is that it treats your fitness activities and workouts like a video game: you get a certain amount of points for your activities, and at a certain number of points you level up. There are also quests and achievements, which is a nifty feature. I'm levelling up slowly, and right now have to be careful not to push myself too far lest I do myself some sort of injury that would sideline me for weeks. Still, it's fun to come back after a long walk and find that you've gone up a level because of it.

I've been going for walks/runs with Sergent, who is thrilled with the added exercise. He's of the opinion that we're not going fast enough, and I'm doing my best to increase my speed little by little. I'm hoping that by the time spring rolls around I'll be able to run for 30 minutes straight with him, and increase that to an hour by the end of the summer. We shall see. Right now we're doing a sort of prelude to the Couch to 5K program, because my ankles are not yet up to running even the few short intervals required for the first day in the program. I figure I can probably start running in earnest next week.

In related news, I bought myself a small bench press with some sand-filled weights from a guy on Craigslist. I loved weight lifting when I was going to the gym regularly: it was by far my favourite part of my workout. Therefore this weekend's project is --while I'm not passing out from working a nightshift-- to clean out the basement enough to set up a small area to use as a home gym. I bought myself some coloured foam mats for the floor, and with time I'd like to set up a bunch of equipment down there. I have a few free weights as well and a small TV, so I figure I can make it a pretty appealing little area. I need to find some mirrors to hang so I can keep an eye on my form, too, but that will come later.

In short, I am getting a kick out of getting back into shape. I promise I won't bore you with all of that here, except for sporadic and non-specific updates. If you're interested, I'm writing more in-depth about it at [livejournal.com profile] rocking_thing, but it's mostly numbers and tracking and whatever. Not all that interesting. ;)

Or, hey, if you're interested in Fitocracy, I am happy to figure out how to send out an invitation. Just drop me a line. :)

Sick Day

Dec. 28th, 2010 10:09 am
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (All Bendy)
I'm off work, but I'm sick, yet again. This time it's in the form of a cold, which was really nasty over the weekend and is insisting on lingering far past its welcome. This poor health kick can stop anytime it wants, really.

So today the plan is to stay home and curl up in my bed. I may do some writing, too.

I will also be making soup, and cooking a chicken that will otherwise go to waste. The cold got me up at 4:00 this morning, and although I tried valiantly to go back to sleep, it didn't work, so I puttered around all morning and tidied.

The exciting point of my day, to give you an idea, was switching out the cat litter for something less expensive. The cats seem okay with it so far.

I am watching the new Hawaii 5-0, and enjoying it a lot more than I thought I would. It's a lot of fun, and I very much like the actors in it, so it's an all-around win. :)
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Overtime Fairy)
Overslept, but managed to get to work just in the nick of time. After the gastro of death last week, today I have a sore throat. I think my body is trying to pay me back for not having anything more serious than a cold and couple of migraines for the past couple of years.

Had a lovely Christmas, anyway. The parental units loved their presents, and I was pretty spoiled myself this year. My father once again wrote me a card that made me cry. It's a tradition now.

Work has been crazy the past couple of days. It seems that bad guys don't take Christmas off. Still, it makes the shift go by pretty fast, so I can't complain.

I am in the midst of planning my life for the next year. It involves a large desk calendar, several new notebooks, and colour-coded pens. Muaha. Yes, I am indulging my office supply fetish, but it's all in a good cause.

With any luck, this time next year I will be a whole new and improved person. :)
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Can't Cope)
How can you relapse with a gastro one week after the first one, is what I'd like to know? I was feeling a bit off yesterday, in a "Gee, these symptoms are similar to how I felt before I spent half the day puking," way. Then I slept for shit, and sure enough this morning, well, I will spare you the TMI.

But it's been a week! And it only lasted a day last time! WTF?

I had to call in sick to work. I hate that! But it's that or be violently ill around other people, so I guess I'll take the sick day.

At least I'm not ill on Christmas. Haven't done that in a while.

Going back to bed. Feh.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Dead Baby Possum)
Appear to have contracted gastro through the internet. It's the only explanation I have. Either that, or it's food poisoning. Mind you, food poisoning would be better since it goes away faster.

I never would have thought the day would come when I'd be hoping for food poisoning. Does that count as irony?

Bleh.

I have crawled into bed with my laptop and the cats (they are THRILLED that I am sick), and am planning to spend the rest of the day here. Ick.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Doesn't mean what you think)
Y'know, I've noticed that what few entries I've posted lately have all sounded as though I'm horribly, horribly depressed.

I'm not, for the record. :)

There's just not much going on in my life. I've settled into a pretty quiet, not-very-social routine. I go to work, I cuddle the cats, watch DVDs, drag myself to the gym. Apart from that, I haven't had much energy to do anything else.

I actually cooked last night, for the first time in a while. I've been a bad camper since before Christmas, keeping the food-from-scratch thing to a minimum. I've been at the very least trying to keep the pre-made foods to a minimum also, but that essentially means I've been surviving on omelets and pasta, with the occasional real food thrown in after spending a day cooking with [livejournal.com profile] luvenditti.

So now I'm going to try to get back on the bandwagon in earnest. Easier said than done, but I'm going to give it the good ol' college try.

I have errands to run today, including taking Gretzky back to the vet for her two-week checkup. She's pretty much fine now, although whatever infection she's got going in her eye hasn't entirely cleared up. I'm guessing the vet will want to continue with the eye drops —much to Gretzky's disgust. She is not a fan of eye drops, and wriggles like a mad wriggling thing whenever I try to apply them. Since we've been doing this for two weeks —three times a day at first, now twice— she's come to view my ministrations with a weary resignation.

Then it's other, more boring errands, tidying up, and tomorrow it's back to work. Fun times.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Vodka gods)
So that cold I've been fighting off for the past few days is asserting itself with a vengeance. I am about to dump a bunch of NyQuil on it and call it an early night.

If I didn't know better, I might also involve alcohol. Except, of course, that I have to be at work at christalmightyit'searly o'clock tomorrow morning.

Meh.

I'm in a surprisingly good mood for someone with a cold.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Winter Is Coming)
So the next three days involve me and work and very little else. Joy.

I still hate November. It is kicking my ass hardcore this year, and I'm not entirely sure why. I am all paranoid and anxiety-ridden lately. It's not crippling or anything, but I would very much like it do be over and done with, THANK YOU.

On the plus side, my stomach is no longer trying to stage a military coup, and so for that I am grateful. Small mercies, and all.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Dead Baby Possum)
Can't manage the shenanigans that I used to before. After yesterday's massive police op, today my body decided that, nope, it was on strike.

Ridiculous.

Either that, or some of the food we ordered in yesterday really didn't agree with me. I'm hoping that's it, because, really, if I can't handle one little eighteen-hour day once in a while, then becoming a cop is going to be problematic.

Eesh.

Luckily I had today off work, so I've been alternating sleep with Tylenol.

Am I the only one whose head aches like a SOB when my stomach is upset?
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (Winter Is Coming)
It's not quite a Class 3 zombie outbreak, but we have two members of the OCC down for the count, one with a confirmed case of H1N1, the other with a suspected case, and definitely some kind of flu.

Bizarrely, I am still unfussed, although we are quite short-staffed at the moment. I still think this is all being blown way out of proportion to its merits.

In the meantime, the office REEKS of Lysol and is giving me a serious chemical-induced headache.
mousme: A view of a woman's legs from behind, wearing knee-high rainbow socks. The rest of the picture is black and white. (That went well)
I felt better today, but not enough to go to work. Now I get two days off before going in on Saturday morning, which is nice. My shoulder is all but healed, and I'm well over the worst of the ick due to the codeine.

So tonight I'm heading to bed early-ish, and with any luck I'll be all good by tomorrow.

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